Allyson, agreeing with the tightening and making clearer. Without losing that breathless impetus the piece has, the sense of excitement about being on set. And my inner line-editor is screaming that "wispy" has no 'h'.

Allyson, I should be writing an essay and not skimming here at all, but I really wish I could read the rest of that. It may be that it could be tighter, but I didn't notice that; it really grabbed me, right from "fireworks and sawdust".

Allyson, although a re-read does make me think that things could be tighter, the first draft sucked me right in and made me want to read more.

That said, I loved the Tor editor so much I was half tempted to turn James into a vampire and Jack a werewolf on the spot so I could pitch to her.

Coffee. All. Over. Keyboard.

Okay, anyone who wrote a "Drums" drabble and didn't post it to the LJ GWW community, if you want to post it, please do so. Because only 3 people posted "Drums" drabbles. Feel free to post them even after I announce that....

Challenge #25 (Drums) is now closed. Any drabbles on this topic that you just haven't gotten around to posting to LJ, feel free to post; no new drabbles, please.

Challenge #26 is the following: the lies we've* told so often that they've become real in our* minds.

*The "we" and "our" does NOT mean that the drabbles should necessarily be personal experience; it's certainly fine if they ARE, but because of the way the challenge is worded, I just wanted to be crystal clear that this isn't a challenge where you must spill your guts. You can spill your characters' guts instead.

Hey y'all, I was just scanning the writing gigs listings on craigslist, and saw a couple that might be of interest to folks here....

Any cat people willing to write for free? [link]

Susan, check this: [link]

There are also any number of new online zines looking for "edgy" and "hip" for free, FYI.

I'm Fine

You say it, and say it, and say it.

"No, just tired. No big."

legs hurt, they hurt like hell, but not enough to make a big deal out of, just enough, just enough

"Tired, that's all. I could have slept better."

I lay awake half the night, because the apnea affects your breathing, and after awhile I'm terrified to sleep because what if you stop, will you please go see a doctor

"Just tired. I'll live."

everything hurts, can't sleep, worry, pain, can't sleep, can't wake up, and it never eases up, not ever, it's my life

"Really. I'm fine."

And, another one:

You Did the Right Thing

Nothing is permanent. Nothing stays the same, not even the assurance we take like vitamins for our sanity, day after living day.

Today's pill contains a maintenance dose of "I did the right thing." Toss my head back, hoping I don't choke, swallowing before the coating dissolves and the bitter taste comes through, destroying its efficacy: I Did The Right Thing.

Gulp it down. A slithery aftertaste of "he was stronger without you, you did right to leave" drops a sour reminder of what happens when the assurance wears off.

But for now, it's a truth pill. "You did the right thing."

Thanks, Jesse--I emailed him/her a description of my services and fees.

It's normal, isn't it, that 24 hours after a conference, in which an editor and agent requested partials, that I'm looking at my first three chapters, seeing nothing but flaws, and saying, "Self, you are a rank, arrogant amateur. What makes you think you're ready to play with the big girls?"

Really, it's just the first eight pages or so, where I keep having to explain stuff without breaking up the action too much. It feels clunky and unnatural. It gets better once I'm not introducing 6 characters at once, but it's the first 8 pages that have to hook them in. And I can't think how to fix them yet.

Werewolves and vampires.