Susan, excellent points. I tend to agree - no nemesis is needed.

Erin, several reasons, as follows:

1. I ran into the Big Buzzsaw of Comglomerated Publishing, in which the most powerful editor in tthe industry at that time asked me if I could "stick a few rapes" in the novel I was working on. Because "our demographic audience likes rapes - you know, guys, 14-22."

2. My agent at the time was totally worthless.

3. My editor at Pan in London left to go be head of a femminist press in Australia, and left me with a male editor, who was so fucking befuddled by "And Then Put Out the Light" that he tried marketing it as science fiction.

Feh.

OK, got my second positive rejection letter from an agent today (well, insofar as a rejection letter can ever be positive). This is from an agent I met at conference who requested people send her first chapters only. Here are the relevant bits:

I really enjoyed reading the partial of Lucy and Mr. Wright. Unfortunately I found the pacing a bit slow and wasn't convinced about the first person narrative, so I am going to have to (reluctantly) pass.

I really had fun reading Lucy and Mr. Wright. It's well-written and witty, which I really adore. All in all, it was a pleasure to read. Thank you.

I wish that we had found a fit. Regardless, I wish you the best in finding an agent who is passionate about your work.

OK. As I said, a positive rejection letter. I've heard from two agents now, and so far neither has said anything that would remotely make me think I don't have "it" and should quit writing--rather the reverse, in fact. But, I now have a second opinion agreeing that I might just have a pacing problem, and (thankfully) more specific information on just what it is. I'm a bit worried that she picked up on a pacing problem just on the first chapter, though, because I thought I'd polished it to death and gotten rid of anything remotely extraneous.

"Wasn't convinced about the first person narrative," is, IMO, maddeningly vague. I've come up with three possible interpretations:

1. It's a technique issue. She doesn't think I handle first person well, and/or that my POV character is plausible in the role. I really don't think this is it, largely because if I'm any judge of my own skills, I'm a very strong first person writer. However, who says I'm a good judge of my skills? Few people are.

2. She doesn't think this specific story works well told from only one POV. If so, it's a judgment call, and I disagree.

3. She thinks it'll be difficult to sell a first person romance, no matter the quality, because they're currently out of fashion--the preferred style is third limited alternating between the hero and heroine's POV. If so, I should probably try a few more agents/editors, but focus most of my energy on my new book (which is third person limited with alternating POVs). Maybe in a few years the style will change and Lucy will be marketable, or I'll become an established writer with enough cred to sell a first person romance.

All that said, and given that she was so complimentary in general, do you think it would be acceptable of me to write her back, ask for some clarification on what she meant about the first person issue (I wouldn't go into a lot of detail--I'd just ask if it was a technique she felt I'd yet to master or a marketing issue), mention that I'm working on a second novel in third person with a more action-oriented plot, and ask if I could submit it for her consideration when it's finished if I'm still unagented then?

Susan, I'd actually ping her, thank her for the valuable input, and ask her if she'd please clarify her feeling about the first person narrative?

Because I tend to agree with you - you have a good strong first-person voice, and I do think it works in the story.

In re the pacing, I also agree - that's two agents who feel there's a pacing issue, and they both mentioned it unprompted, so there's a consensus. In re stripping out the extraneous? That may not have anything to do with the pacing issue as they perceived it. I haven't seen the rewrite, remember - only the first chapter. Hard to tell from just that.

I think my next steps are to finish my current re-read, fix whatever I catch, and then give it to A) Dylan, since he's a ruthless editor who doesn't pull punches on account of being married to me, and B) someone who reads a lot in that subset of the genre. And tell them to look above all at pacing.

And, I'll definitely email the agent for more input. Thanks!

I posted the text of my next on-writing essay for WriteMovies.com on my live journal, if any one has any feedback. I'm thinking about blowing it (along with some of my back columns) into a full-blown book on writing:

How to Succeed as a Failing Writer

Opinions welcome!

Victor, I liked the piece. I left an anon message tho.

I ran into the Big Buzzsaw of Comglomerated Publishing, in which the most powerful editor in tthe industry at that time asked me if I could "stick a few rapes" in the novel I was working on. Because "our demographic audience likes rapes - you know, guys, 14-22."

EWWWWWWWW.

Yeah, I could see how that could put you off.

Susan, it sounds like your rejection letters are pretty encouraging, actually! I'm so excited for you. I mean, you wrote a book! And it's THERE for people to reject!

Ok, maybe it's just me, but THAT'S SO COOL!!!!

OK, I'm all inspired. I'm going to print off what Ihave and let me dad read it (heh -- true test of love "Daddy, read my 20 pages of novels. Turn of the Chiefs playoff game!) and finally make the changes Deb et. al. have suggested kindly.

Inspiration provided by y'all, mostly, but also by reading last night. I read the new "Dragonkin" by Anne McC and her son Todd McC., and it was pretty dull. I think he wrote most of it, and the backflap says he's working on a solo Pern novel now.

There were HUGE errors in the novel, and the pacing sucked and the characterization was boring, and the ending was just...yawn.

I HATE neoptism. Just because your parent is a writer, Todd McC. and Christopher Rice, doesn't mean you are.

And yet, they're published on the strength of their folks' sales.

As are WHITE HOUSE PET BOOKS.

Feh.

Christopher Buckley did turn out a writer. I wonder if he was afraid to come home if he didn't... He's sort of funny...for a conservative.

Oh, there are exceptions, I'ms sure. It's just that...most of them SUCK.

Wrod.