I'm a vision of hotliness, and how weird is that? Mystical comas. You know, if you can stand the horror of a higher power hijacking your mind and body so that it can give birth to itself, I really recommend 'em.

Cordelia ,'You're Welcome'


Natter 46: The FIGHTIN' 46  

Off-topic discussion. Wanna talk about corsets, duct tape, or physics? This is the place. Detailed discussion of any current-season TV must be whitefonted.


DavidS - Aug 11, 2006 7:22:43 am PDT #2061 of 10001
"Look, son, if it's good enough for Shirley Bassey, it's good enough for you."

I think the key to an astronaut v. caveman battleground is that you each give them the advantages of their own defining characteristics. Else why say "astronaut" instead of "modern human"? Why say "caveman" instead of "aboriginal hunter"?

Even beyond that, I think the key philosophical question here is: "who wins in a fight between a fit military engineer who can create weapons and has knowledge of battle strategies, or an experienced hunter and killer who is probably stronger?"

So a superior alien race is having Sweeps week and have pay-per-view gladiatorial combat. They grab an astronaut and a caveman and drop them into the battle zone. They implant the knowledge that two enter and only one leaves to be returned home. The battle zone looks like a park, but has a number of buildings in it. The buildings have tools. The caveman has access to the kind of stones he uses in making spears and slings and stone age weaponry. The combatants are given two days to make their gear and then they're loosed to hunt.

So, can the astronaut build something in that period of time that will give him an advantage over the caveman's superior hunting skills and strength? I say give the astronaut the equipment he'd find in the average garage and he could make a crossbow pretty easily. He could also better create traps for the caveman, who we will coincide is not only a better hunter, but more used to killing.

Now that's a scenario where I think you're making the distinct advantages of caveman v. astronaut clear.


§ ita § - Aug 11, 2006 7:26:52 am PDT #2062 of 10001
Well not canonically, no, but this is transformative fiction.

why say "astronaut" instead of "modern human"? Why say "caveman" instead of "aboriginal hunter"?

Because modern human doesn't imply former military as Allyson was assuming, and aboriginal hunters would be pretty pissed at being equated with cavemen on many levels.

I say give the astronaut the equipment he'd find in the average garage and he could make a crossbow pretty easily. He could also better create traps for the caveman, who we will coincide is not only a better hunter, but more used to killing.

I don't see it. Why does being an astronaut translate into complex weapon creation and trapping? Why are we conceding that the caveman is more used to killing people?


tommyrot - Aug 11, 2006 7:29:27 am PDT #2063 of 10001
Sir, it's not an offence to let your cat eat your bacon. Okay? And we don't arrest cats, I'm very sorry.

These days, not all astronauts are military/ex-military.


sarameg - Aug 11, 2006 7:30:51 am PDT #2064 of 10001

Astronaut goes to garage. Gets in Hummer. Mows down caveman. The End.


Strix - Aug 11, 2006 7:33:50 am PDT #2065 of 10001
A dress should be tight enough to show you're a woman but loose enough to flee from zombies. — Ginger

Astronaut goes to garage. Gets in Hummer. Mows down caveman. The End.

Doesn't take a Hummer. Just a Toro.


Jessica - Aug 11, 2006 7:35:06 am PDT #2066 of 10001
And then Ortus came and said "It's Ortin' time" and they all Orted off into the sunset

Both Farscape and Angel say that the cavemen win. That's got to be worth something.

Now that's a scenario where I think you're making the distinct advantages of caveman v. astronaut clear.

I also don't see how astronaut = expert weapons builder. If you put an astronaut and a caveman each in a falling-apart spacecraft, the astronaut's more likely to come back alive (by the simple fact that the caveman is unlikely to know how to read or use duct tape), but that's a different kind of expertise than building a rocket launcher from scratch. Your scenario is essentially Caveman Vs MacGuyver.


tommyrot - Aug 11, 2006 7:35:49 am PDT #2067 of 10001
Sir, it's not an offence to let your cat eat your bacon. Okay? And we don't arrest cats, I'm very sorry.

Doesn't take a Hummer. Just a Toro.

Or a woodchipper. Or a chainsaw.

Houston, we have a chainsaw massacre.


Fred Pete - Aug 11, 2006 7:36:54 am PDT #2068 of 10001
Ann, that's a ferret.

Even a Saturn.


sarameg - Aug 11, 2006 7:37:57 am PDT #2069 of 10001

Even a Yugo would get the job done.


CaBil - Aug 11, 2006 7:39:16 am PDT #2070 of 10001
Remember, remember/the fifth of November/the Gunpowder Treason and Plot/I see no reason/Why Gunpowder Treason/Should ever be forgot.

Thanks sumi, but it's just me. -Someone- forgot to log out the last time she used it, and so I accidentally posted my news under her name before fixing it...