The DC police chief has declared a crime emergency.

What, is Crime in trouble again? This is the third time this week. Ima dock his allowance.

I would do the retyping thing. Not a phonebook, because of formatting issues. But I've been known to write scads about nothing (or song lyrics) in order to keep my eyes open during meetings or training sessions.

Watched a couple episodes of psych. I quite like it. The star's incredibly Zach Brafflike.

Watched a couple episodes of psych. I quite like it. The star's incredibly Zach Brafflike.

that's a negative, as far as I'm concerned, but he's toned it down since the pilot.

Caltech grad students. Not boring. Bugfuck crazy sometimes, but not boring.

That's typical of grad students in general. And not just in the sciences.

So saith a former grad student.

but then I remembered that scientists are really, really boring.

Hush you. I have a terrible crush on a very non-boring scientist.

There was a certain irony to my original statement, given that I am a scientist. Well, it was ironic inside my own head, anyway. I'm happy to see people defending scientists as merely crazy, rather than boring. Crazy people are much more likely to be invited to parties.

SFGate has a great article on how W. is That Guy:

In other words, he is indeed That Guy, like the best man at the wedding party, the one standing out in the center of the room, casually and cluelessly telling off-color jokes that offend everyone but which he thinks are gul-dang hilarious and, hell, if you're offended then you're just some gul-dang hippie liberal. Haw.

He is That Guy. The one who thinks he is everybody's bestest pal, the guy everyone wants to kick back with and have a few brewskies and chat about baseball and lawn fertilizer and Jesus. After all, isn't that what we all desire of the man who decides some of the most difficult, deadly, complicated issues on the planet? Isn't that slacked, frat-guy goofiness exactly what you want trying to broker peace in the Middle East and understand global warming and stem-cell research? Sure it is.

And when it comes to women (or rather, "wimmin"), well, it's all taken one step further. Or, rather, downward. It's like an awkward scene from "The Office," where Steve Carell's character Michael Scott, the smarmy manager everyone secretly loathes but who himself believes to be the funniest and most likable and naturally gifted guy in the room, walks up to one of his female employees and grabs a mango and cracks a grossly inappropriate joke about vaginas and laughs hard, slaps everyone on the back, and then takes a big, gross bite of the mango. What a kidder!

He does not, of course, realize no one else is laughing.

The weirdest thing about it was that he was performing these crimes during the middle of heavy rainstorms. That just isn't done!

Seriously!

That actually sounds kind of like the "express kidnapping" we were told be on the lookout for in Mexico City.

thank you all for the birthday wishes! you're wonderful!

Hi Holli!

Why did I eat that second cupcake?? Why oh why.

Why did I eat that second cupcake?? Why oh why.

Because they're so TASTY!

t /Homer