Oh, this is brilliant: More Beer for the Robots! (And if the credits are to be believed, that actually Al himself.)

(suddenly picturing Frank Pembleton at the train station hissing "Don't you die on me, you son of a bitch..." to the white supremacist.) Is it wrong if I hope it hurt a lot?

Hmmm, so it was a heart attack?

I got a breaking news alert from Yahoo and I thought "suicide". But for that he'd have to have some idea that he'd done wrong or was somehow to blame for his (lack) of future.

Lee, still have a question?

Yep. What do you do with your syringes? It's been suggested that maybe I shouldn't put them into the general trash bin.

What a weird etiquette guide.

If you keep chatting for upwards of an hour, it’s well within his rights to forget about your boyfriend/girlfriend—because it appears that you have, too.

I didn't know being in a relationship gave you a time limit. The section heading says flirtatious conversation, which confuses me. That's a LOT of flirting.

I was digging in my purse for lunch money and I just found a strawberry. Now my lunch money is sticky.

So what other slogans could a crematin service use? Maybe, "Make sure your loved ones really Rest In Peace," with a picture of a zombie on which a red circle with a line through it is superimposed... and/or a vampire.

Or maybe, "Go green. Go ash," or something environmental-ish....

"Rest lightly on the land"

There's a lot of weirdness in that guide. Like this:

How do you respond if you’re straight and a gay person asks you out?
Laugh and say, “I don’t think my girlfriend/boyfriend would approve.” It won’t become awkward unless you become patronizing.

How is their suggestion less awkward and patronizing than simply saying "No thank you, I'm straight"?

Argh:

Who pays the bill on a date?

The asker pays, unless the woman does the asking—then the man should pay. If the check’s on the table and her suitor hasn’t moved for it, a woman should allow him a one-bathroom-trip grace period. If it’s still there when she comes back, she should split the bill but is entirely free to silently ruminate about what a cheap jerk he is. (For same-sex couples, the asker really does pay.)

Oddly enough, when I offer to pay and a guy lets me, what I think is that the guy assumes I have a bank account and want to pay, not that he's a cheapskate. Sigh. (I mean, I don't mind being paid for, either, though I wouldn't want to always be the treated one. But this kind of crap just makes men more stressy, I think.)

Yep. What do you do with your syringes? It's been suggested that maybe I shouldn't put them into the general trash bin.

I think a nearby vet has a biohazard drop box (I'm not really sure, it's outside and it seems really ODD ) that were I a responsible person, I would investigate.

In reality, I bend/snap the needle, recap them, and toss them into a juice carton. When the carton is full, it goes into the dumpster.