Thanks for the suggestion, Jesse. I did just have to tell one student that I could not grade it as it was handed in because it is almost directly from the Web (which kills me, because he handed in a rough draft. Did he even read my comments?). So I told him to do a web search on "plagiarism paraphrase" so he'd understand the problem.

And here's another one which seems to have the same errors as her rough draft. I'm feeling less amused as I get further into the stack.

I've got to say, Emily, grading papers seems like the worst task ever. I mean, I nearly gave myself a heart attack today trying not to make someone add semicolons to her bulletpoints.

Dana, I like! It has body! (I, err, tracked them down.)

I think I tracked them down, too -- it looks great! And if it doesn't, then someone else's haircut looks great under your name!

Speaking of bullet points, I am writing one of those infernal cover letters with bullet points. After, "Please allow me to highlight my qualifications as they relate to this position:" How do I properly punctuate those bullet points? Do I capitalize the first letter of the first word of the bullet point? I'm never sure, so I usually just try to be consistent.

If what's in the bullet point is a whole sentence, I capitalize and put a period at the end. If the bullet point is a phrase (and the whole thing makes a sentence), I don't capitalize, use semicolons and "and" after the last semicolon. And a period at the end of the last bullet.

I want to see Dana's hair. NO FAIR.

Thanks Jesse.

Keep in mind, my authority is basically pulledoutofmyass.com.