Maybe Hec doesn't realize you're paraphrasing your mother?

I didn't! Sorry, P-C.

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I dreamed I danced with Jack Nicholson. He was taller than I expected.

I dreamed that I had a baby. I mean, I dreamed about giving birth. And then I had no fucking clue what I was supposed to do with a baby. I mean, a BABY. Mine. I was terrified.

And all day I haven't been able to shake that feeling.

[Please to note: there is zero chance that I could be pregnant -- trust me on this -- so it wasn't a prophetic dream.]

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I think I may have a piece of glass stuck in my boob. I broke this hanging vase by stupidly pouring glass beads into it, and it all came falling out on top of me and all over the floor. I thought I got it all cleaned up, but just realized that something was irritating my boob. Went and looked. It's very red, but I don't actually see any glass or cut or anything.

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I dreamed I danced with Jack Nicholson. He was taller than I expected.

now that's what you should be telling your family.

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I think I may have a piece of glass stuck in my boob.

Oh dear. That doesn't sound like fun, love. I've had bits of glass stuck in less stressful places (ankle, thigh, bum etc - yes, there was a story involving me in my nightclothes and a metric shitload of broken glass falling on me) and they eventually worked their way out without any terrible Death-by-glass, or anything.

Not sure whether to suggest you leave it there and let it work its way out, or to suggest going to the doctor. Hmm.

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Call the doctor and ask. Probably she will tell you that you don't need to come in now, ,but give you signs to watch for and have you come in if they occur or if the redness does not go away quickly or if you are really sufffering. But you have a bunch of other stuff going on with your body - which is why I would call a doctor and ask.

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Ugh. I was afraid of that. Emily's party starts in a 1/2 hour. I think I'll wait and see what happens. If it's still red later, I'll page my doctor.

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On some days, I also think I'm better than God. Which doesn't make much sense for an agnostic person to think.

I would think it would make a lot of sense for an agnostic person to think. You are knowable to yourself. Agnosticism involves taking the stance that whether or not there is a god/gods is unknowable.

The fact that I'm agnostic means I think everyone else is stupid for believing in God.

You might want to amend this statement, or some of your biggest fans are going to stab you in the head with a fondue fork.

Oh ye of little faith. What Anne said.

...

Oh! vw!

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vw, you can pour some hydrogen peroxide onto it. If there is a tiny piece of glass there, it might cause it to bubble to the surface so you can take it out. (This is my tried & true method for removing splinters and glass.)

• sigh * Owen just stripped naked while DH was giving Liv her bottle. No wonder I never have time to fully catch up around here.

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Cash, I think you should trim it further into a little mohawk or something and use kool-aid to dye it blue.

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