Simon: I, uh... I never-never shot anyone before. Book: I was there, son. I'm fair sure you haven't shot anyone yet.

'War Stories'


Natter .44 Magnum: Do You Feel Chatty, Punk?  

Off-topic discussion. Wanna talk about corsets, duct tape, or physics? This is the place. Detailed discussion of any current-season TV must be whitefonted.


Jesse - Apr 21, 2006 1:13:27 pm PDT #2778 of 10002
Sometimes I trip on how happy we could be.

Heh. My grandmother recently got a new mattress as a gift, because hers was at least that old, but she wasn't going to buy a new one, due to the fact that she's just going to die at any minute (her attitude, not ours), so why waste the money?


ChiKat - Apr 21, 2006 1:17:31 pm PDT #2779 of 10002
That man was going to shank me. Over an omelette. Two eggs and a slice of government cheese. Is that what my life is worth?

I'd be all "Mom! I can't do boys younger than the mattress I'm doing them on!"

does some quick math

Oh. Dear. I think that during my Summer of Indiscretion I slept with someone the same age as my mattress.


Kathy A - Apr 21, 2006 1:20:57 pm PDT #2780 of 10002
We're very stretchy. - Connie Neil

My mattress set came from my mom, who had it up in the guest bedroom. I think it was the one she bought when she moved into a condo back in 1985, so that makes it now 20 years old. Being a guest bed, it wasn't used all that much during that time until I got it a few years ago, except for the 20 months I used it when I boomeranged back home in between jobs 15 years ago. Still, I plan on replacing it, most likely next year at this time (I'll probably use my tax refund for it).


§ ita § - Apr 21, 2006 1:28:34 pm PDT #2781 of 10002
Well not canonically, no, but this is transformative fiction.

I think that during my Summer of Indiscretion I slept with someone the same age as my mattress.

That's kinda cool. I mean, apart from being obviously morally objectionable.

The IVR system I just used not only expected me to talk to it, it also said "Hmm." You are a computer. You're not making anything any better.


ChiKat - Apr 21, 2006 1:32:12 pm PDT #2782 of 10002
That man was going to shank me. Over an omelette. Two eggs and a slice of government cheese. Is that what my life is worth?

That's kinda cool. I mean, apart from being obviously morally objectionable.

Well, he was legal. He, and the mattress, were 22. I, on the other hand, was...ummm.... Not.


Strega - Apr 21, 2006 1:32:17 pm PDT #2783 of 10002

I have a foam futon that's thick & mattressy. I love it. And it came squished into this square box, so the guy who delivered it tore open the box and the futon just kind of inflated/exploded out of it, which was quite entertaining.


Kalshane - Apr 21, 2006 1:34:20 pm PDT #2784 of 10002
GS: If you had to choose between kicking evil in the head or the behind, which would you choose, and why? Minsc: I'm not sure I understand the question. I have two feet, do I not? You do not take a small plate when the feast of evil welcomes seconds.

Fifteen minutes per bed? I'd go nuts.

No kidding. Not only the time involved in trying each one like that, but I'd feel incredibly self-conscious lying on a bed in a store for that long. When I went to buy a new waterbed matress after mine exploded a couple years I go, I kind wandered around and shoved on the top of the assorted matresses, and that was the extent of my testing.


DavidS - Apr 21, 2006 1:40:05 pm PDT #2785 of 10002
"Look, son, if it's good enough for Shirley Bassey, it's good enough for you."

Hey, check it out! Our new printer has a scanner!

I'm gonna be a scanning fool.


Lee - Apr 21, 2006 1:41:02 pm PDT #2786 of 10002
The feeling you get when your brain finally lets your heart get in its pants.

I need a new mattress, but I dislike the idea of shopping for one intensily, for some reason.


§ ita § - Apr 21, 2006 1:44:08 pm PDT #2787 of 10002
Well not canonically, no, but this is transformative fiction.

I dislike the idea of shopping for one intensily, for some reason.

Think of all the thirteen minute naps you'll get to take.