And, yes, I'm up too goddamned late again. I've been trying to "rehearse" by having my playlist on the iPod and doing stuff around the house. I just got very paranoid about rehearsing at full volume too late at night. Even though I'm the only one who lives here, I was just too worried about my neighbors possibly being disturbed. So I listened on the iPod and softly sang lyrics to myself. The good thing about that is that I know I really know my shit when I can do things like cook and wash the dishes at the same time as singing the playlist. That means that I can handle nearly any distraction that might happen during the gig without flubbing lyrics. Unfortunately, I'm not quite there yet. And I've got to meet the accompanist at noon for our last run-through. Oh well. The show must go on.

Good luck, you!

Crap. It really sounds like you need to not be living with this guy.

...I'm going to have to say, in defence of Not!Emily, that it's entirely possible that he is not expecting you to do his dishes, or clean up for him. Obviously, I don't know the details of this situation, but I speak as a slob, on behalf of my people. (They would have elected me, but it would have involved getting off the couch and they couldn't remember where they put the voting slips...) I really am a slob. I am a terrible slob. It isn't malicious slobbery, though - it isn't sneaky subtexty "If I leave these here, then maybe somebody else will do them for me, heh heh heh" kind of slobbery. It's just that my own mess threshold is far far away from that of your average tidy person. FAR away. Happily my flatmate is of the same kind of mindset as me, and we muddle along fine, both registering mess at more or less the same time. However, when I was at Uni I shared a flat with 3 girls, and unfortunately 3 of us had far greater mess tolerance than one of us. She was absolutely infuriated, and understandably so, but it really wasn't malicious on any of our parts - it wasn't a 'she'll do it, I don't need to' mindset. It was more of a '....oh, hey, she's tidied up. Huh. I suppose it was kind of messy. Oops.' mindset.

Um. Which isn't to say that Not!Emily is a good egg, because I don't know him from Adam, and I think that him having asked you to tidy up when HE had guests, and HE chose to piss off out to play sports, leaving his slumbering girlfriend and the flatmate with electrodes in her head... well, this doesn't speak well of him. But, speaking as someone whose slobbery would undoubtedly make you homicidal, I just had to chip in.

I don't know whether that exascerbates the situation, or not - but I remember my old flatmate being at her wits' end with us, and feeling that it was intentional, premeditated she'll-do-it-we-don't-need-to kind of thinking, whereas it was just genuinely not-being-worried-about-it-and-planning-to-get-around-to-it-eventually kind of thinking.

Which is, I realise, just as annoying to live with, if one has anything approaching an Inner Bree. (My own Inner Bree ate all her home-baked cookies, left the dirty mixing bowl and batter-spattered work surfaces, and went off to write porn in the garden...)

eta

If I were in your position, I wouldn't feel too bad about having my own stash of things like Clorox wipes or other things that Not!Emily tends to use without replacing.

Not at all, I think that this would be entirely reasonable. If he is making free with your stuff, or if he's using stuff that's General Kitty-purchased stuff and then not replacing it, then HELL yes, keep your stuff where he can't get it/doesn't know about it. That isn't even petty.

Thanks, vw. I hope the universe gifts you with a wonderful day.

Damn, you two are just having NO luck with the living situations. And I've had drive-you-batshit-insane flatmates myself, and I know how wretched it is to come home and feel that you have no refuge, that home isn't home. It sucks.

I do wish you both all the best with your respective situations.

vw, I'm sorry Not!Emily is such a stressor. Maybe if you tried to look at it like, "There are times I leave our dishes in the sink," (if there are) or such, you'll feel less angry at him.

Fay, I actually think it's more of a case of me and Emily being much messier than he would like. His room is spotless. I think he's given up in the common areas, which means if anything's going to get done, it's done by me. I honestly think he's trying to hold his tongue about his wishes and just get through the next several months.

But, in the meantime, he's being passive-agressive...leaving things and not doing his chores, because, well, what's the point? And that pisses me off.

Huh. 'kay, sod him. On behalf of the Slobs of the World, I rip up his freshly-minted membership card, and point him sternly in the direction of Irritating Wankers of the World, which is meeting several doors down.

it wasn't a 'she'll do it, I don't need to' mindset. It was more of a '....oh, hey, she's tidied up. Huh. I suppose it was kind of messy. Oops.' mindset.

Yeah, I had a situation like that with my old roommate, B. She finally was like, "it drives me INSANE that you leave your dirty dishes in the sink for days on end." and I said, "OK" and worked on keeping them clean. Then I moved in with someone who did the same thing and all of a sudden, I was the clean roommate. Now Tom and I do lot of cooking in a pretty small kitchen so keeping the decks cleared is totally necessary. But it's shared, so it works. And my parents' house is just... disgusting. And the older I get the more I DO NOT want that life. So gross. Anyway.

vw's Roommate #3 is definitely an asshat. vw, though, take care of you, and try not to let it loom too large. He's not worth the energy. Just want to be sure that you have enough energy to take care of *you* over the next few weeks/months.

serial: I am home from work today. My cold was getting worse and I felt feverish last night. Tom arrived safe in Atlanta, so that's good.