'Potential'
Off-topic discussion. Wanna talk about corsets, duct tape, or physics? This is the place. Detailed discussion of any current-season TV must be whitefonted.
that is crazy. Could that bit of info been what made him relationship material?
I would hate someone calling me after a date to talk about where we see things. And I don't really care what they tell me about why they don't want to see me. I don't really care why, the end result is the same.
It's almost a hypothetical for me until this latest dating experience, because in general I've gone out on very few dates which have left me with any desire to see the person again, and I'm happy not to press the point if they don't. But if I'm asked out on a second date by someone that I don't want to see again, I level with him that I don't feel any chemistry or whatever and decline—I figure treating him like an adult rather than waffling or playing games is the best approach, and I expect that treatment in return. A polite refusal may be disappointing, but it's not insulting the way being strung along is.
Especially since they are not going to be as honest with me as with their friends(Which I suppose courtesy demands, in some cases, but it's not like they are interested in helping me fix myself.)
that is crazy.
Worked out well at the time.
Could that bit of info been what made him relationship material?
Or it might have set a pattern in motion. Don't know. See why I get curious about what real people do?
I don't really care what they tell me about why they don't want to see me.
I'm more opposed to not being told anything at all. I'm not in a position to judge if it's really him or me or whatever, but I like "I'm busy" to mean just that, not be code for "too busy for you"
I would hate someone calling me after a date to talk about where we see things.
If we're talking "Let's go on another date" vs. "I don't think we should go on another date." I'm fine with it. If it's about my prospects as a wife or mother (or lack thereof) I don't want to go there.
I've solved this whole dating problem by not dating. I imagine this doesn't work as well for people who are less misanthropic.
Ah, Shrift and I are as one. (But not dating!)
I look around at other people who take the existence of love and relationships -- well, not for granted, but have a sense through experience of how they fit into people's lives.
Also this. (I guess that would make Shrift, ita, and I as three.) Dating just seems like WAY more trouble than its worth. Maybe I'll know I've found The One when dating doesn't seem like a pain in the ass.
Back from many errands. Got cat litter, cat food, some toiletry stuff to pack, dropped off Tim's gift from Strega (he loved it, Strega, and has stuff for you), and am now about to have some leftover wonton soup and noodles before attacking the rest of the cleaning, and then pack.
I'm terrified that I'll oversleep tomorrow for some reason. I usually take redeyes, not morning flights.
Maybe I'll know I've found The One when dating doesn't seem like a pain in the ass.
IME, it's more the realization of "I don't have to date any more, ever!" that clues you in.
If we're talking "Let's go on another date" vs. "I don't think we should go on another date." I'm fine with it. If it's about my prospects as a wife or mother (or lack thereof) I don't want to go there.Yes, I was taking a very non-Orthodox, American view of what Nilly mentioned. I wouldn't have wanted to know too much, but hated the insincere "I'll call you." Don't say that, if you're not going to. Just say "So long," it won't hurt. I promise.
it's more the realization of "I don't have to date any more, ever!" that clues you in.
I've already had that realisation.
It's why I'm single.
If we can't establish if a second date would be welcome while on the date, then the only reason for a phone call is to ask me out again. Really no reason to call and say your not interested for any reason.
I am trying to think of the last dates I had. I think the most recent one went well, we both left saying we had a good time and would like to see each other again. I think I emailed 2 days later and he never called or emailed. Clear enough.