This headline may be the best part: Customer glued to toilet seat sues Home Depot
To my mind, it becomes less funny when you learn that he didn't do it to himself, but was instead the victim of a prank.
Marco: Do we look reasonable to you? Mal: Well. Looks can be deceiving. Jayne: Not as deceiving as a low down dirty... deceiver.
'Out Of Gas'
Natter 40: The Nice One
Off-topic discussion. Wanna talk about corsets, duct tape, or physics? This is the place. Detailed discussion of any current-season TV must be whitefonted.
tommyrot - Nov 03, 2005 8:37:48 am PST #1067 of 10006
Sir, it's not an offence to let your cat eat your bacon. Okay? And we don't arrest cats, I'm very sorry.
shrift - Nov 03, 2005 8:50:41 am PST #1068 of 10006
"You can't put a price on the joy of not giving a shit." -Zenkitty
I just opened my fortune cookie. Do you know what it said?
Right now you need to be patient.
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAA
Dana - Nov 03, 2005 8:52:46 am PST #1069 of 10006
I'm terrifically busy with my ennui.
Note to self: No Chinese for lunch.
beth b - Nov 03, 2005 8:53:27 am PST #1070 of 10006
oh joy! Oh Rapture ! I have a brain!
Fortune cookies know everything.
I just watched the second episode of Viva Blackpool. I am enthralled, bbut I have no idea if I like it. but I just don't get the detective. How long oies he think he can keep the secret from the wife? but I like him. I know that much .
shrift - Nov 03, 2005 8:56:32 am PST #1071 of 10006
"You can't put a price on the joy of not giving a shit." -Zenkitty
Dude, I'm burning this fucking fortune cookie on my next smoke break.
JZ - Nov 03, 2005 8:59:31 am PST #1072 of 10006
See? I gave everybody here an opportunity to tell me what a bad person I am and nobody did, because I fuckin' rule.
Dude, I'm burning this fucking fortune cookie on my next smoke break.
I'm having a disturbing vision of shrift snarling fiercely and covering it with tiny cigarette burns, muttering, "You wanna lecture me, cookie? I got your patience right here, fucko!"
sarameg - Nov 03, 2005 8:59:52 am PST #1073 of 10006
I think that's the proper response.
Jesse - Nov 03, 2005 9:04:10 am PST #1074 of 10006
Sometimes I trip on how happy we could be.
I just got an email from someone who wanted my phone number so she could yell at me. HA HA HA.
§ ita § - Nov 03, 2005 9:05:13 am PST #1075 of 10006
Well not canonically, no, but this is transformative fiction.
Give her GWB's phone number, Jesse.
I've just remembered a third reason I might faint. The whole not eating thing.
Know what suck? Vicious FUCKING circles. Or cycles. Or both. Whatever.
shrift - Nov 03, 2005 9:05:47 am PST #1076 of 10006
"You can't put a price on the joy of not giving a shit." -Zenkitty
Why, JZ, it's like you know me!