The last guy who voiced his interest in me having longer hair said it was so I'd look more feminine. I'm not sure what the point of me looking more feminine is -- one would think working from the inside out would be more useful.

I did have one guy bemoan "But what am I going to hold onto???" It did take me a second to parse the root of his pain, and my answer was very much "Nothing attached to me, asshole."

I used to get it a lot -- I don't know if it's my age, or just 2005 is more tolerant, but these days it's much more complaints that a specific woman looks like crap with short hair, and she shouldn't have done it.

It might also be that I've reached the place in my life where very few guys think it's worth criticising my visual choices.

Then they can buy a wig. My hair is not about some dude's enjoyment

Obviously I have no use for guys who are way into long hair (and very little for guys way into short hair -- just because I qualify doesn't make me more comfortable). But aren't there parts of a guy's appearance/physicality that please you, that you like to play with and explore? His hands, lips, neck, whatever?

Tep and I are as one. Sign me Tired of "Oh, you cut your hair...(sigh. Deflated look) And I don't have Kay Howard hair...it's just, like, blonde, stringy and unmanageable long because it's not thick enough. I love longer hair on men...not to the Anita Blake extent but a man with nice long hair would get my attention...I shouldn't say that. I'll start a buzzcut trend.

I was going to get my hair colored today. But I have a misbehaveing waterheater.

bah

let the game of waiting for the water heater man begin.

Then they can buy a wig. My hair is not about some dude's enjoyment

But aren't there parts of a guy's appearance/physicality that please you, that you like to play with and explore? His hands, lips, neck, whatever?

That's not quite the same thing, though. I don't think I'll ever run the risk of a guy cutting his hands off.

There really isn't a good comparator. My objection is guys who want you to have long (or short) hair because *they* dig it in and of itself.

I guess it's sort of similar to women who start dating a guy and immediately change how he dresses. Though that's not a perfect comparison.

Then they can buy a wig. My hair is not about some dude's enjoyment.

Or date someone who also finds it appealing. Whatever.

People have preferences. I don't appreciate being called a "size queen" but, hey, that's life.

Tep and I are as one. Sign me Tired of "Oh, you cut your hair...(sigh. Deflated look)

Heh. My mom tells me frequently how much BETTER she likes my hair long.

I have to work really hard to not point out that my hair isn't All About Her.

I have to work really hard to not point out that my hair isn't All About Her.

Maybe that's one of the places where you don't need to work so hard. I mean really, what would it hurt to say that?

yay call from boss. I have to take vacation not sick time -- which I don't understand. Whatevea

That's not quite the same thing, though. I don't think I'll ever run the risk of a guy cutting his hands off.

But you could date a lean guy who became buff, or a guy whose love handles you loved who lost them -- as women we have a lot more "optional" bits, but still. I think as humans we can get attached to stuff.

It's off to get attached to things before you even meet someone, and then miss it when they lose it (or suggest that they gain it, to make you happy) -- that definitely bugs me. But plain enjoying what's there, and missing it when it's gone -- well, I have insisted a guy grow back a beard, and I don't feel slightly bad about it. He wasn't that attached to the barefaced look, so it wasn't a struggle.

And I do so like a guy in a goofy half-ponytail, even when I know it isn't the most flattering cut. It makes me smile. I like smiling. I like when hot guys make me smile.

I just don't ask them to keep doing so on my behalf.