I thought wearing black to a wedding was "not done".

That's pretty much gone by the wayside, especially for an evening wedding, double-especially that far into the fall.

Happy Anniversary Nora and Tom!

I want the skirt

also the dress

someone give them to me now! maybe the princess army can go storm the wearhouse for me....

Good to know, if I'm going to get a new dress, I want something I would wear again and black is my usual color.

At an evening wedding black is fine. One of my cousins got married about two years ago and almost all the women were wearing black dresses. Some were dresses with a print and a black background, but still black. The most popular style (including mine) was sleeveless, almost mid calf, with black underdress and a black chiffony over lay thing with a pattern or design on that. And a whispy little shawl thing, usually that came with the dress. No hose and sandals or pumps -- that turned out to be a good choice because it rained the whole night and the dance floor and part of the food were outside (under cover) and most of us ended up barefoot and dancing on the dance floor/in the mud.

The color and the swingy hem would be stunning on you.

Thanks! Yes, it's very tempting. [bookmarks] I may see about getting either cash or a gift certificate from my folks for my birthday, and blow it all on clothes. 'Cause I'm liking a fair bit of what I'm seeing this season.

I thought wearing black to a wedding was "not done".

I don't know. For my social circle, it's (obviously) not an issue. I've been to a couple of more 'normal' weddings recently, and there were a fair number of women wearing black.

I wore black to the last wedding I was at, but I wore it with a bright scarf just in case. (Since some people do still have Issues with black at weddings, and I'd never met the groom's family.)

K-Bug has ta GORGEOUS green halter top dress and C has a blush pink with black mesh overlay dress. My mom has a black skirt with a fancy white blouse. I'm the only one with nothing so far.

I'm just enough old-school Southerner that I don't feel comfortable wearing black to weddings, but it's a rule that's fallen by the wayside that I observe anyway just 'cuz.

That said, at several of the weddings I've coordinated lately, I've seen guests dressed super-casually--women in khakis, men in jeans, etc.--and that does kinda bug me. Granted, I wear khakis to coordinate, but I'm doing things like getting down on my hands and knees to pin the aisle runner in place. But as a guest, I figure if the bride is in floor-length satin, I can show enough respect for the formality of the event to put up with a few hours in a dress and hose.

Oh, Gris, when she gets settled again, -t converted to Judaism before her marriage, and it was at least part of the catalyst. I think they might be either Conservative or Reform, but she might prove a resource or sounding board for you.

Oh, that's great. I'll definitely be on the lookout.

Talking to a Rabbi or a series of Rabbis is the only way you're going to find the answers to these questions

Oh, I know. And if my interest stays piqued, this will happen. And thanks for the link, I'm bookmarking it for later exploration.

However, I think any Orthodox rabbi is going to expect you to obey the laws of kashrut and of "family purity"

These don't bother me nearly as much. I mean, the "family purity" is a bit weird but I can live with it, or at least acknowledge understanding of the rule, whether I follow it or not. I wouldn't be tempted to protest it as a policy to the Rabbi, because it doesn't ping my "grrrrrr" chord. And kashrut, I'm perfectly fine with - dietary restrictions make sense to me as a religious exercise, even if the why of what's restricted is never explained, really.

Leave my child alone

WTF? That's fucking psycho.

ETA: Not "leave my child alone," the policy that made it necessary. Is psycho. Obviously.

PRINCESS ARMY!

Have you read The Diamond Age by Neal Stephenson?

FAKE ETA: OMG X-post. Okay, not actually, but I mearaed the above bit BEFORE reading Calli's post.

Good luck Susan!