Maybe it's the fact that I sometimes hang out on naming boards, but my rule has always been that it's fine to critique a hypothetical name. Frankly, when I was in the process of naming Annabel, I was glad to hear when names had associations for people that I never would've thought of, either because I was too tied to my own associations or had just missed some corner of pop culture that most of the public would know about. Sometimes I ignored it--there was one person that seemed to think Annabel=Clarabelle=Moooo!--but it's all taste and opinion. And frankly, I am baffled why any halfway Celtic boy name gets turned into a girl name. Why do people who'd never name a girl John or Timothy name them Dylan or Ryan or Aidan? I'm not saying that as criticism; I just honestly don't get it.

The interesting thing about Jesus is how, time and again, the exclusionary and the cliqueish get on his back for eating with the wrong people, doing the wrong things on the wrong days, touching people who shouldn't be touched. And every time, he tells them to stop being such exclusionary assholes, because the Son of God is RIGHT IN FRONT OF THEM and he's telling them that if they'd stop with the stupid rules and the politics and the meetings and the personal assurances that they were first in line for Heaven they'd realize that they are the same broken people they're sitting around despising, and for Christ's sake love one another damnit.

Wrod.

Agreed, but what if one of your friends was going to name her son Betsy?

Or you discovered that Betsy is now in the top 100 for boys names, and that people are starting to assume that Betsy == male?

Robin, Beverley, Kelly, Terry, they're all lost to women now. I'm drawing a line and saying that Dylan was a Welsh GOD and not a goddess and DAMNIT IT"S A BOY NAME AND I DIDN"T SPEND THE LAST 33 YEARS HAVING TO CORRECT MISSPELLINGS AND MISPRONOUNCIATIONS JUST TO HAVE MY GENDER CONFUSED!

THE LINE MUST BE DRAWN! HERE! IT SHALL NOT GO! ANY FARTHER!

but my rule has always been that it's fine to critique a hypothetical name

I've said this before and in this very thread -- it's not a hypothetical name with me. DH and I have been planning to name our first child Dylan regardless of gender since at least three years before I became a Buffista. It's fairly set in stone at this point, and anyone who wants to change my mind can feel free to bite me.

Just as a data point, I knew both a female John (possibly spelled Jon) and a female Michael in college.

My brother-in-law and I, for all intents and purposes, have the exact same name. Nobody seems to have much trouble telling us apart.

lost to women? What's next, sapping your manly humors? Giving you cooties?

Am I even allowed to express my personal preference for non-androgynous, gender-specific names? It's OPINION. It's TASTE. I'm not stopping anybody from naming their kid whatever the hell they want just by talking about my own likes and dislikes.

I mean, I'm pretty sure Hec and I baffle each other over our reading tastes and how we express them, and maybe even think the other's taste is inferior to our own, but I don't feel like that means we have to stop talking about what books we like and dislike and why.

I want this house: [link]

Modest, but close to Pete, Jilli, and my comic book store.

I don't feel like that means we have to stop talking about what books we like and dislike and why.

Yes, but it does mean that when somebody says "I intend to name my baby Dylan" you stop saying "Dylan is a lousy name for a baby girl."

That's common politeness. Taste in baby names is much more emotionally fraught than taste in books, and in this group, that's saying something.

Or you discovered that Betsy is now in the top 100 for boys names, and that people are starting to assume that Betsy == male?

I would engage in the time-honored Indiana custom of bitching to my friends *as long as none of them had a son named Betsy*.

Am I even allowed to express my personal preference for non-androgynous, gender-specific names?

Sure. And when your chosen expression of said personal preference puts the word "kill" next to my publically announced future baby name, I'm allowed to consider that a little thoughtless.