One thing confuses me: why does the fitted waist fit over the pooch?

Because, if your belly is shaped at all like mine, it starts to curve outwards just below where your natural waistline is. Not the waistline located where the fashion industry has been trying to trick us about, which is anywhere from 3 to 6 inches lower than the natural waistline.

Straight legs are your friends

Yes. As are plain-fronts. Pleats are evil on just about everyone.

So very true.

One thing confuses me: why does the fitted waist fit over the pooch?

Anything cut for a specific size should allow some room for the fitted factor, I think. And it really does create the illusion that you're tapered, too.

Also, the tapering is at the side, and especially on shirts and jackets, the front is flat panelled. As bellies are usually all sticky out in the front, the shape hides that and accentuates the shape at the side, where the waist should be.

I have to be the voice of dissent on the straight-leg jeans. I have a significant buddha belly, and straight-leg jeans look like death on me. Because they *appear* to get skinner toward the ankle, making the hip/waist/buddha area look even BIGGER. Sort of like an inverted triangle.

Perfect jeans: low-rise (but not so low my undies hang out) boot-cut, with a bit of stretch.

Boot-cut = ideal. Not as exaggerated as a flare, but wide enough that they make the thigh/hip/waist area look trimmer.

What looks good when you have a lump in the middle but are NOT pregnant?

Also, A-line dresses/skirts.

Steph is right on the A-lines. I can't speak to pants, as I wear pretty much exclusively drawstring pj bottoms.

Natural sodas are nice and all, but lack the artificial flavor zing I require in my pop.

Perfect jeans: low-rise (but not so low my undies hang out) boot-cut, with a bit of stretch.

Enthusiastically seconded.

Congrats, vw!!

And speaking of jobs, fucking fuck fuck fuck. As soon as my mom wins points for pointing me to a potential hook-up, she burns them all away by telling me to get a lab position. If I wanted to work in a fucking lab, I would have stayed in grad school. Working in a lab gives me no useful experience in the medical communications field. Then she goes on about how she thought I was going to be a scientist doing research, so what did I study? What was the point of all that glorious education if I wasn't going to have a fucking doctorate and work in a fucking lab and cure fucking cancer? I feel like killing myself to shut her the hell up.

Boot-cut is good if you've got a big bum but don't want to look like you do, because they end up looking straight rather than flared. Worn with heels they lengthen the leg too.

Boot-cuts are included in the Aimee Lexicon of Jeans and Trousers "straight legs". I almost exclusively wear them. They are perfect for most body styles.

Boot-cuts are included in the Aimee Lexicon of Jeans and Trousers "straight legs".

Ah, I misunderstood.