It's far from the first time I've heard of doctors refusing to do this, but it always sounds so wrong; smug, paternalistic, infantilizing of the patient.

It is strange. I suppose if we pushed we'd be able to get something done. But my doctor said, "the Nuva Ring is reliable and inexpensive, right? Is there any reason you NEED to switch to something permanant (or semi-perm) at this time?" And I agreed. Even though I don't want kids, making a choice to NOT have them seems like a big commitment. (that's more the vasectomy vibe)

My doctor says she's seen women go on the IUD and regret it because they changed their minds later and had difficulty conceiving. I don't know. I changed the subject quick because I do like her in many other ways.

erika, I saw this in the paper yesterday and thought you'd appreciate it:

"The death of a 45-year-old lawyer discovered in the trunk of a burning car is ruled a homicide."

It's just ... was there any doubt?

((((vw))))

I'm glad you're enjoying biology, vw! I know you were nervous about it...

vw, take care sweetie. Insent.

I want kids. It's one of the few things I have never questioned in my life. Lately it has been more about reminding myself that it is going to be a while before I can even consider when to have kids, and talking a lot to my therapist about my fears of not being able to physically care for an infant. He has been trying to convince me that there are ways to adapt to limitations. That being said, I don't get questioning someone who doesn't want them or does want them. What's the point?

Nora, if you're looking for something permanent, I've been considering Essure. It's an insert for the fallopian tubes, but it's non-surgical. Of course, a doctor who won't do a vascectomy probably won't put in essure implants either. But it looks like a really cool option.

If I'm ever remotely likely to have sex again I'll be getting it.

{{vw}}

It used to be true that the IUD was hard to insert on a woman who hadn't been pregnant before, but I don't think that's true any longer.

It's not the inserting, it's potential (and with today's variety, rare) fertility-destroying complications they're worried about.

Though I strongly suspect it's much easier to insert on a post-partum cervix than on a tightly-closed unused model.

Sorry if I sounded churlish about Alistair. If I meet one who doesn't evoke an upperclass twit of the year, then I am fully prepared to revise my opinion. It's my problem, not the Alistairs.

Ms. Bug, here is your mantra when you feel the panic coming on: "I'm flippin' out like a mammal! And yet, though I am a mammal, does it perforce require that I flip? Nay, not! For indeed, many mammals are flipless, perhaps even sedate. Consider the humble sloth. Not so flippy..."

I'm hoping that by the time you're done with that you'll be so distracted by the nagging thought that "Hec is an idiot!" that crisis will have passed.

I always used to want kids -- or, at least, I really really *wanted* to want kids, because it's What You're Supposed To Do When You Reach Womanhood (gag, barf, hello stereotype).

But lately, I'm not feeling the mythological "clock ticking" that you hear women in their 30s talking about. I don't have any particular desire for kids, though if I married or had a LTR with someone and *he* wanted kids, I probably would have them (or at least one). Because, while I don't have any particular desire for kids, I'm also not anti-kid-in-my-future.

Toddson, ha! Sure he could've decided to end it all and from inside the car, set it on fire... JZ, I'm just blunt.(But not blunted...totally sober) I hope I didn't offend.