Yahoo headline:

FEMA head replaced, dead collected -

If only it were literal.

No, this is not a joke:

[link]

Oh, man. It's clear that the attempt is to be jovial and lightening spirits, but they're getting the scale all wrong. I almost feel sorry for them, and then I think, nobody's making them open their mouths.

To be honest, politics in the "needless bureaucracy and ego" sense aside, I would be uneasy with Bush invoking something called the "Insurrection Act" as well. On the other hand, my Math Thinking Skills teacher was talking on Wednesday about the hierarchy of "properties of people you want to hire": a decent human being, a person who can do the job, a person who masters the job, and finally someone who can adapt to changing circumstances and figure out how to do a job that nobody has done before. Which seems to have been the problem here. Maybe all presidential candidates should have to face the Kobayashi Maru.

I was speechless, because your hair -- which was still long and brown and shiny -- was also masses and masses of big loopy curls.

Clearly I had taken a detour back to junior high on the way to your office.

Now picturing shrift in kayle's dress from Firefly and making a ribbon bouquet for the bride to be and playing shower games.

Reality's a little closer to me in a Batman & Robin t-shirt mixing a Captain and Diet for the bride to be and playing 'how soon can we blow this popsicle stand and go to the bar?' games.

What a disgusting person the reverend is! But everyone here thinks that, I'm sure.

His title was "Rep." not "Rev."

This news story is sort of how I think Allyson will be at age 93.

***********

A 93-year-old woman with a "grip like iron" fought back against a robber by grabbing him by the testicles.

The Lithuanian woman, who says her strong grip [comes from] years of milking goats, held on to the man until police arrived.

Soja Popova, from Klaipeda, was shoved to the ground when she opened the door to two young men. But she fought back by grabbing the nearest by the testicles and squeezing "with all my force as hard as I could."

She told police: "He started screaming like an animal and his friend was trying to pull him free, but I have a grip like iron." The man's screams of agony and his friend's shouts for the woman to let go alerted neighbors, who called police.

God bless her.

OK, that is a different kind of disgusting, Cindy. Still very disgusting, but not from the pulpit. But I can hit him in the'nads with greater impunity if he doesn't have a calling.

My favorite part is, ""He started screaming like an animal..."

Note to self: Wear cup when targeting geriatric Lithuanian women for home invasions.

Here's wishing ita a wonderful time in Africa. Preferably free of the Toto earworm that's now plaguing me.