I think the lesson to be learned from all this is that when you're choosing a MoH, you need to consider their people skills as well as their friendship to you.

My best friend and I have both threatened each other with bloody painful agonizing death if, should either of us ever get married, any shower/party involves a stripper in any way. Or 6-foot inflatable penises that the bride has to carry around to all the bars for the bachelorette party, before she does so many shots that she barfs ON a guy who's bent over in front of her eating candy off her t-shirt, which featured lifesavers sewed to the shirt, along with the iron-on statement "SUCK FOR A BUCK". (Dude, I should really scan those pictures in.) It was, in pretty much every way, the embodiment of the bachelorette party cliche.

I guess the problem with wedding showers is, they've outlived their original purpose. In a time when the bride (and maybe the groom too) moved directly from their parents' home to their post-wedding home, it made sense for a gift-giving occasion that was less -- fancy, maybe -- than the wedding. To give those necessaries for the home that wouldn't necessarily be suitable as wedding gifts.

But now, it's the norm for both the bride and the groom to have set up housekeeping (together or separately) for some time before the wedding. Which means that the issue is less likely to be, "How do we help these kids set up their first home?" and more likely to be, "How does the couple consolidate two apartments' worth of stuff into one place?"

And the bridal shower has become an Event to rival, or even outdo, the old-fashioned Bachelor Party. It's the bride's farewell to single life.

So how do you get through to people that it's possible to have a shower, even an Event shower, without taking on debt to rival the GNP of France?

Look, MaidZilla needed to be torn a new one. Sorry to hear you got the lucture, but really, without you standing up to MZ, who was gonna?

Clearly, a cluesticking was needed, if not a cluemugging.

Hi, Dylan, welcome.

Aw, thanks you guys.

I bought these shoes today at lunch to wear to the wedding I'm going to this weekend. I'm wearing them under my desk to try and break them in a little, but I can't really walk around the office in them because they're much too slippery. I need to put little scuffy things on the bottoms when I get home,

Jess, happy anniversary to you two! You're a beautiful couple.

No kidding.

I concur.

Hmph. I've been with my Ethan longer than that, and nobody took me to a spa.

Hee. But they've been together for 8 years and are JUST getting married.

The last shower I attended was nice, because I got to meet other people who were attending the wedding, and got to give a "go you!" gift to the bride that she didn't have to share.

They did request setting up a home stuff, despite her selling her house so they could move in together. I just didn't feel the shower was the right place to pull from that list.

It was a lovely shower, even if distantly related to the bride's personality. There were coloured sandwiches and lovely teas and desserts. Plus I won stuff.

Maybe we ought to start giving stuff away at bridal showers. Make it a sort of free-for-all to claim duplicate stuff.

So how do you get through to people that it's possible to have a shower, even an Event shower, without taking on debt to rival the GNP of France?

My shower/bachelorette party was seeing The VaVaVoom Room show at Fez, with my sister (who was also my MoH). She bought my ticket and drinks, and the whole night came to about $40.

[link fixed]

Jessica, have you tried scratching the soles with your keys?

(couldn't work the link, btw)