From a bridal etiquette site:

"I would like to give the shower in a really nice restaurant, but I can't afford to pay for the guests' meals. May I ask the guests to pay for their own meals?

A: No. Entertain within your budget."

It's from here [link]

Third shower, first bachlorette party. I'm "supposed" to throw one in September, but I'm thinking no.

No. I could excuse one overly extravagant shower, but not 4 overly extravagant get togethers.

But one was in Michigan, one was here and one was thrown by my boss at my work.

This is different.

See, Andi is all polite and shit. My e-mail to MoH would be "Do you UNDERSTAND that when you're organizing/hosting a party, you don't MAKE THE GUESTS PAY?"

"P.S. -- Bitch, EAT IT!!!"

t edit Oooh -- e-mail her the link ND found!

I have a best friend since childhood too(we mostly keep contact in nostalgia now, but whatev. I still love her, but I also know she is a loon.) A raised-by-hippies sort of loon, so at least we could keep the ducats out of it, but she still won't be planning substantial stuff for me. Ever.

I have heard of paying for a bachelorette party. A no gifts expected, buy your own drinks at the bar kind of thing, but paying to attend a shower and being expected to bring a gift? so.very.tacky.

I'm trying to picture my bestest bud planning my wedding shower.

BB: So the beer tasting will start at 3 and the martial arts movie marathon will start at 3:30. Chocolate noshing will be ongoing.

Me: You do remember that I hate beer, right? The rest sounds great.

BB: Righty-oh. Beer crossed out, Aussi shiraz penciled in.

Hmmmm. It's almost enough to make me want to get married.

I have heard of paying for a bachelorette party. A no gifts expected, buy your own drinks at the bar kind of thing, but paying to attend a shower and being expected to bring a gift? so.very.tacky.

Yes, this. For a close friend's wedding this spring, the bachelorette party was a simple dinner out, at a BYOB place, so the MoH brought wine. We all chipped in for dinner, which we knew going in.

The shower was definitely hosted. Even there, though, I know it was hard for another friend of mine who was a bridesmaid, because the whole thing ended up being fairly expensive, and with dress, gifts, other expenses, contributing to the shower was hard for her.

Whatever happened to *not* having a shower at a restaurant? Mine was at a friend's house, and it was lovely and fun and low-key.

Also, are the same guests invited to these showers, other than the wedding party? Because that's also a big etiquette no no.

Hec, this might be a cat story you might like, believe it or not. My cat Rocky walked across my keyboard and pulled up a site. Not just any site...SF apartment-finders site.I can't remember visiting it, but I must have. Maybe he's hinting...though I look at the rates and despair.

Timelies.

One of my classes was cancelled. It's the one credit course that meets twice a week in September. So now I will only have my two classes on Wednesday, until my other 1 credit begins in mid October. I can't seem to find anything else that will fill the hole, and I'm not sure I should.

Sounds like a blessing in disguise. You have a sort of slow ramp-up to get back into the swing of student-y life.

~~Robin & Steph~~ (Those are the lovely waves of heat coming off heating pads).

P-C, glad things seem to be going forward in some fashion. Best of luck with however they pan out.

Anybody else? I distribute hugs and glitter indiscriminately!

{{Aimee}} Everybody else has said it more coherently than I could manage. Just gaah!