July/August, as I recall, is the worst time to look for work around these parts. Everyone's off doing stuff.

Did I mention I hate being dependent?

Gah, me too. I'm still working, but nowhere near enough hours, and I hate not having a nice bit of padding in my personal account. The bedrest and complications knocked our original plan for a loop, so I wasn't able to save up huge wads of dough while pregnant.

I don't think I'd hate it if this had been the plan, and if DH's salary was a bit bigger and we'd decided the family division of labor would involve him making the money and me raising Annabel and working on my novels

But it's still not *his* money, is it? Any more than Annabel is *your* daughter? You're both doing what you need to, right now, and even if money's tight, everyone needs a haircut once in a while.

Chalk up today's feelings to the blues -- the pain and the heat and the inactivity. Plei is right about this time of year, especially when it comes to publishing. The whole romance world is at RWA, so you're not going to get much news one way or another right now. Consider it a little vacation.

But it's still not *his* money, is it?

Well, the plan was that DH's salary would cover the bills and his personal expenses, while my freelancing would cover my personal expenses and, as it grew, expand to pay down debt and build savings. Only it didn't work. So in a sense I *am* taking his money, since I wa supposed to be earning enough money myself to cover these things.

Can they use only one sea anemone to get the goods and then synthesize the rest from non-animal sources? Because that would make me really happy.

Heh. I don't recall how the harvesting process works. I know they modify the purified peptide anyway, but I don't know whether they've been able to synthesize it.

Well, the plan was that DH's salary would cover the bills and his personal expenses, while my freelancing would cover my personal expenses and, as it grew, expand to pay down debt and build savings.

Oh. But still, freelancing is always a risk, which you both knew, right? I guess I'm saying even if *you* feel bad about it, he probably doesn't begrudge a haircut.

Despite the money fretting and the guilt about dependency and all, I'm still gonna vote for sucking it up and asking; it's shallow as all hell, but there is indeed something comforting and ego-stoking about the transformation from stupid hair to cool hair. And, as therapy or self-medications go, it's still very very cheap.

Also, Jen and Cindy, insent.

wrod. And you're into it this far, right? That haircut money won't take anything away, right? Or, could you trust a student? THey're cheap, if a bit of a time committment as you are somebody's, like, bangs final.

Susan, my sympathies. I know the pain of of the budget, yes I do.

And I so didn't mean when I first posted to start something that would offend anyone or bring my simmering money anxiety up to boiling over levels.

Just so tired, so hurty, and so wishing I could see some kind of light beyond this endless tunnel.

You'll be fine, Susan. You have a plan, and you are working on it. Sure, not you're original plan, and adjusting takes time, but you're on the road.

I am tellilng myself this a lot, and I don't have nearly as much of a plan, not am I doing as much to accomplish my goals.