Some of those retouched photos are just bad photos. Bad lighting, etc.

Why are they creepifying the eyes like that? They're taking perfectly beautiful eyes and making them look like glass doll eyes.

A friend of mine played football at FSU a few years ago. He was treated very well. If he wanted $200 sneakers for workouts he got two pairs that night. Best dorms, etc, couldn't really flunk out or end up broke. It was a pretty sweet deal.

Until he effed his ACL. Then he lived with his folks and worked as a security guard and went to college part time. FSU paid for all the surgeries and rehab. Once his knee was on the mend they paid for a gym membership and a football camp to get him ready for a reassessment. (He was shocked at football camp when he asked for a different brand of cleats and they just looked at him like he was insane.) Ultimately they decided the knee wasn't better enough for football and cut him off completely.

Now he has a baseball scholarship at a New York school. The money isn't as good, he commutes, he'll graduate in a few years at age 24 or so.

I feel marginally better about the scary doll retouched photos, because so many of the kids look comparatively normal in the unretouched photos (also human, and like they contain actual personalities and are not just hollow elastic-plastic shells howling their soulless, smiling agony into the limitless void).

But the retouched photos are still just bizarre. They're so uncanny valley; I can't imagine what the world looks like to a parent who could look at one of those unretouched photos of their baby, look at the retouched version, and sigh, "Oh, that's so much better." I'm morbidly curious what these people expect visually from their children, other humans, the art in their lives, but I also kind of think I don't really want to know.

Wouldn't a picture be more useful if it actually looked like the kid? I suppose people send them out to promote the child, but when said child arrived for the event they'd have to be holding the picture so the organizers would know who they were dealing with.

Wouldn't a picture be more useful if it actually looked like the kid? I suppose people send them out to promote the child, but when said child arrived for the event they'd have to be holding the picture so the organizers would know who they were dealing with.

I think most of the pageants have a "Most Photogenic" contest that those photos are entered in.

I think most of the pageants have a "Most Photogenic" contest that those photos are entered in.

ie, "Which photographer is most able to make a normal child look like a Precious Moments figurine?"

ie, "Which photographer is most able to make a normal child look like a Precious Moments figurine?"

Closer to a painting on black velvet purchased in TJ, I think.

eta: my first cool number in ages!

Mom's home from OK. It was long and my uncle managed to top previous ass hat behaviour.

I won't go into it, but he's a complete and utter ass and most 12 yr olds are more emotionally mature than he is.

My G'ma is getting worse. Mom had to admit that it's probably time for assisted living, she just has to convince my aunt.

Mom notice that G'ma can't get her shoes on right and that she wasn't holding her fork right to cut meat. She can remember things for about 30 seconds and that's it. Even when she just ate she can't remember that they ate, much less what she ate.

And it's worse. G'ma told Mom "I can't remember my first husband's name." Her first husband is Mom's dad, my grandfather, they were married for over 50 yrs. Mom said she nearly started crying and that after a minute or so of prompting G'ma finally got it.

If y'all could send my aunt and Mom lots of ~ma so they can make the right decision and not feel so guilty about the decisions they are going to make.

When they do make the decision to move G'ma to assisted living they will probably end up with Uncle Asshate and Aunt Spoiled Brat, who have in the past acted like they are so hurt and betrayed that Aunt J is talking about doing that to "their mother".

Uncle Asshat lives two hours away and I don't think he's spent more than a day helping take care of G'ma in months.

I think most of the pageants have a "Most Photogenic" contest that those photos are entered in.

And there's a separate line of photo only competitions without even a pageant connected.

As a kid, I wonder how it feels to be such raw material. Airbrushed pictures of other people can be bad enough for self esteem.