Will someone remind me that people will still love me even if my cake is the ugliest thing on the planet?

I'm not coming, because I knew you'd make an uglyass cake. Scott stayed out of work every day but Wednesday and today, so that I could tell the truth when I said he'd been out of work all week, and therefore escape looking at that horrible cake. Ugh. Why do I even know you?

How's it taste?

vw--where things having to do with other human beings are concerned, I think you should work real hard to replace "perfect" with "wonderful." I would much rather have a wonderful evening (which includes lovely bits of imperfection--since I am imperfect myself) than one which is perfect.

vw--where things having to do with other human beings are concerned, I think you should work real hard to replace "perfect" with "wonderful." I would much rather have a wonderful evening (which includes lovely bits of imperfection--since I am imperfect myself) than one which is perfect.

While this is all wise and healthy and shit, I have to note that I am still simmering with bitter rage over the ugly ass cake.

I can't forgive it and here's why: because cake means something. And when somebody puts time and effort into doing something special for me and then their cake is less than exactly level? Well, it means that their love is lopsided as well and clearly they are not a good person, but a person with lopsided love. Which is no kind of love at all. Obviously. In fact, the whole gesture of generosity becomes suspect at that point. It is almost as if they were trying to mock me with their lumpy cake.

::glares at vw with the wounded look of a betrayed friend. Tastes frosting when she's not looking. Sneaks a chocolate covered strawberry. Taps foot imatiently waiting for her to leave the room to steal another strawberry::

I've been meaning to talk to you about his... No wait, I've already talked to you about his like ninety jillion times.

Hee! Sometimes I just need reminding. And I come to the right place for it :)

I would much rather have a wonderful evening (which includes lovely bits of imperfection--since I am imperfect myself) than one which is perfect.

Very good point. I am hoping for a wonderful evening. I was just hoping for a perfect cake :). I'm remembering, though, that one of the best things I ever baked looked hysterical. I have a picture of it somewhere around here (not on the computer, though). We called it "The Leaning Cake of Carrots." It was the most fabulous carrot cake I'd ever tasted, but I did not get my mother's cake-making genes (my mom used to bake cakes for a living...she's amazing). I cut it so crooked that the thing leaned. We were afraid it was going to slide right off the plate before we got a chance to eat it.

Sweetie, nothing looks pretty when it's in somebody's mouth. I've seen pictures. Also, what Hec said.

Oh, and Cindy, I knew the truth was gonna come out!

I love you guys. You're making me laugh, which is keeping me relaxed, which is going to contribute to a fabulous evening.

I am sure the cake will be wonderful, vw. If you can't stand it, though, put pieces in a bowl with whipped cream, put a couple of the chocolate-covered strawberries on top and call it chocolate trifle. After people pass out from the cholesterol rush, they'll never remember what it looked like. Or go ahead and cut the cake and put it on plates.

vw, what kind of horrible, judgemental people could you possibly know who would look badly at the person who worked hard making a fun party and delicious homemade cake for them? Come on, homemade cake is THE BOMB, no matter how it looks. I just can't imagine you could hang out with anyone who would react with anything but delight.

vw, as we all know, scrappy is wise.

By the way, I look to be 90% sure I'm coming (I know, I know, but it's HOT out there - at least it's somewhat dry). Do you need anything brought with except beverages?

Talking about cake is more positive than researching murders, and yet?

vw, I doubt you'll let your pets eat most of the cake before serving it to your guests, which puts it at least one step above the cake my mom made for her MiL.

The 21(!!!?!) squares of chocolate put it several steps above any cake I've ever eaten. Now personally, I don't think your guests will care how it looks. But if you are really concerned about this, I will be happy to take the cake off your hands. Just email me (profile addy good) and I'll send you my snail mail addy. I am there for you.

Or you could listen to Hec et al, but that doesn't get me super-chocolate cake so I can't entirely endorse such a rash act.