I don't actually get why it's any worse than Guy's Poker Night...but of course I know wives who object to that also.

I know wives who object to that also.

That drives me crazy. My mom told me that the wife of one of my stepdad's friends asked her why she "let" my stepdad go on so many hunting trips with his buddies.

I don't actually get why it's any worse than Guy's Poker Night

Because poker is manly. Playing with toy soldiers is childish. Of course, telling that to the oodles of historical battles re-enactors and their fortunes in perfectly detailed Napoleonic or Civil War miniatures would get you laughed at.

I feel like I should start a gamer dating service--all these lovely girls who would appreciate a sweet geek of their very own.

why she "let" my stepdad go

"Because he's a grown man with his own interests, and I'm a grown woman who's not so insecure that I need to have him tied to my apron strings every minute of the day."

After my divorce, I loved getting out from my Ex's annoying thumb so much that I thought it would be really hard to give that freedom up. (Popcorn for dinner? Sure! Watch old movies until 3 am if I feel like it? Sure!) One of the signs that the WBB was the one for me was that hanging out with him was more fun than hanging out without him 90% of the time. I still have plenty of fun on my own, but having him be home when I am there does not feel like an imposition or a distraction*, which it would with, oh, anyone else on Earth.

• Except this weekend when I was reading HP6.

One of the signs that the WBB was the one for me was that hanging out with him was more fun than hanging out without him 90% of the time.

Ditto. I still go and do stuff by myself, but it's occasional - not all evening a couple times a week.

Also, having kids makes a big difference in this equation. You need your other partner there participating. You also need to make time for the marriage, and that requires a commitment.

"Because he's a grown man with his own interests, and I'm a grown woman who's not so insecure that I need to have him tied to my apron strings every minute of the day."

With a side order of "Because if he didn't get out of the house on a regular basis, I'd be arrested for murder."

I'd *know* that he wouldn't always be hanging about my place, bothering me. I think I need less couple-y-schmoop-time than most human beings.

Oh, hell yes. I know some couples whose social lives overlap 100%. If that works for them, great. I'd go completely 'round the bend in less than a fortnight.

I'm always perplexed by couples who go to parties, and then never leave each other's side (or lap) all night. I don't get it -- you're going home together! You're going back to the same place -- why can't you mingle freely?

(I am, of course, more prickly than the average person. But seriously -- that whole bible verse about the two becoming one flesh? That isn't meant to be literal, dang it.)

One of the signs that the WBB was the one for me was that hanging out with him was more fun than hanging out without him 90% of the time.

Likewise. There are still me-only activities, either because I need the me-time or because it's actively painful to have the DH there (shoe shopping springs to mind), and I still enjoy when he's off on a him-only activity (even if it's only playing a computer game in the computer room), but together-time is great.

Of course, I'm a heathen who thinks adults with kids should occasionally do adult things without the kids...

cereal:

I'm always perplexed by couples who go to parties, and then never leave each other's side

Heh. Diplomatic Corps training - I get really uncomfortable if the DH and I are in the same group at a party. We've been trained for so many years to split up and socialize with different groups (whether hosts or guests) that it's rare we see each other until the end of a party.