Oh Steph! I didn't realize it upset you so much. I'm sorry.

I was just upset that *I* made *her* upset, if that makes sense.

Kara is usually careful with things when she's given a job, and she was badly stressed and needed some focus, which is why I sent her to get it. It's NOT your fault that I didn't think that through.

I just didn't know that she was on a Mommy-Approved mission, and since I had been playing with my digital camera with her earlier, I figured she had hatched a plan in her overlord brain (face it, the girl is crafty!), and so I wanted to protect the technology.

Good intentions all around, I think, but given the high level of chaos and distraction in the place, imperfect communication. (And I've been called oversensitive by many a person, so my reaction was totally in character, really.)

I just found out that someone I really liked was injured in Iraq. In the same attack, some kid I don't know at all died. I'm sorry but it is so fucking unfair! First of all, I would never wish death on the guy I really liked, but why does some young kid, who 6 months ago was probably sitting around his parents house have to die for such a stupid pointless war. One guy lived and the other one died because of the side of the vehicle they were sitting in when they were hit. Just when I manage to get the "death and disfiguring injury" part of war out of my head, and focus just on how much I miss Joe, it all comes back to me.

Anyway, I don't need any punctuation - the prayers all belong with the families of the dead and injured men. I just needed to vent about how angry this all makes me. BTW, if you want to read more details and a fairly well written newspaper article about the attack, it's all here. [link]

Oh, and I also fall into the category of HATE crying in front of people. It always makes me feel so stupid. Thankfully, the Army made me very strong in this regard - it now takes an awful lot to bring the tears in public (unless I'm happy).

(that's fun to say "lemon demonstration" or maybe I could call it a "lemonation")

Perhaps... lemonstration? (Tom and I play this game all the time)

OK, going home. Won't probably be on the computer though. Thanks for everything today- it really helped and I needed it lots.

I do it too easily, but I have frequently used Deena's technique of telling myself I can flip out later, if I need/ want to. Which has only happened a few times.

Have a good trip home, Nora.

Timelies, all!

Nora, I hope you're feeling better, Steph less traumatized.

Here's something that might make you smile: where the buffalo roam - Baltimore (County). (a slideshow of the big bison round-up ... on the tennis court)

{{Nora}}

I cry when I am angry, and sometimes when I am anxious. Now, I'll just tell people, "Look, ignore the crying. It won't go away, so I'm just going to talk through it."

Yep. I've had to do this. I cry very, very easily. When I'm angry, when I'm anxious, when I'm overly-tired ...

Steph, do you feel less jittery today?

Oh, and from over a hundred posts ago: Cashmere, my new website isn't live yet. gothicmissmanners.com has been taken down, and www.gothic-charm-school.com is in the last stages of being finished.

Steph, do you feel less jittery today?

Much. I still feel some restlessness in my shoulders, which is weird as hell, but I feel much less crawl-out-of-my-skin today. I had a beer with dinner last night, and I think it helped smooth out the edges a lot.

Dang, now I feel like crap for having traumatized you. I don't think you were being oversensitive. It was a highly stressful (despite being fun) time. You'd just had to replace your tires and drive forever just to get there and then with all the noise and confusion... argh. You were being helpful. She got to realize that she's not the big girl she thinks she is. It was a valuable life lesson, despite being not so much fun. She's so over it, though, that she thinks I can't tell her where she can and can't eat (aka slurping soup on the floor in front of the television).

She DOES steal the camera now and again, though usually to bring it to me and ask me to take her picture. Aidan steals it to take his own damned pictures, thank you very much.

If you don't yet feel better about it, I hope you do soon. No one, least of all Kara, thinks of you as a meanie.

ION, I just got a call from the tourist board here--the woman wanted to know if the buffistas would come here someday, and I told her about Firefly. She's going to check the DVDs out from the library and watch for the movie. She'd never heard of BtVS or Angel, either, but she's going to look for those DVDs too. Toasters!