I only asked, because sometimes my grandmother's depression exhibited as anger.
But? There's always a but. When this is over, can we have a big 'but' moratorium?
Fred ,'Smile Time'
Spike's Bitches 23: We've mastered the power of positive giving up.
[NAFDA] Spike-centric discussion. Lusty, lewd (only occasionally crude), risque (and frisque), bawdy (Oh, lawdy!), flirty ('cuz we're purty), raunchy talk inside. Caveat lector.
Topic!Cindy - Apr 21, 2005 11:16:56 am PDT #4983 of 10001
What is even happening?
DavidS - Apr 21, 2005 11:22:52 am PDT #4984 of 10001
"Look, son, if it's good enough for Shirley Bassey, it's good enough for you."
I wouldn't put it that way, she's involved in the church, but it isn't like she's there all the time. She's home all day with the kids (aside from preschool, but that's just 15 hours a week) so she needs to get out to spend some time with adults.
Fair enough. And I'm sorry to sound discouraging. I'm all scar tissue on these issues, and kind of flinchy.
Trudy Booth - Apr 21, 2005 11:22:59 am PDT #4985 of 10001
Greece's financial crisis threatens to take down all of Western civilization - a civilization they themselves founded. A rather tragic irony - which is something they also invented. - Jon Stewart
Oy, Gud. It's like watching a train wreck in slow motion. I wish I could say something to offer you hope, but her behavior is very discouraging to me. The key indicator on whether a marriage is going to survive is how respectfully the partners treat each other. It doesn't matter how much you argue, but it does matter if those arguments are laced with contempt.
And her little sniping comments and criticisms are exactly the kind of things which rate as contemptuous. It's a really bad sign. Also all the time she's spending at church, skipping out on you and the kids - really bad sign.
To me she's giving every indication of already emotionally removing herself from the marriage. I'm so worried for you and the kids, and it's so frustrating because I see you working on it, and I don't see her making that same commitment.
Good gracious, man, just offer some support. Let's leave the diagnosis to someone super qualified like a radio shrink. t rolls eyes
Topic!Cindy - Apr 21, 2005 11:37:47 am PDT #4986 of 10001
What is even happening?
Um.
What exactly is cilantro, anyhow?
beekaytee - Apr 21, 2005 11:38:30 am PDT #4987 of 10001
Compassionately intolerant
The key indicator on whether a marriage is going to survive is how respectfully the partners treat each other. It doesn't matter how much you argue, but it does matter if those arguments are laced with contempt.
And her little sniping comments and criticisms are exactly the kind of things which rate as contemptuous.
Not having more info than I can see here, it is impossible to state anything difinitive about anybody's situation, but Hec is not wrong about contempt.
I wish I had the research handy, but I don't. Still, contempt has been shown to be a very bad indicator for any relationship success...whether intimate, work related or familial.
The key is figuring out what role the contempt plays.
Aims - Apr 21, 2005 11:38:38 am PDT #4988 of 10001
Shit's all sorts of different now.
It's a green leafy ingredient type thing (condiment??I don't know.) Kinda like parsley but much yummier, unless you are Allyson.
-t - Apr 21, 2005 11:38:48 am PDT #4989 of 10001
I am a woman of various inclinations and only some of the time are they to burn everything down in frustration
Coriander.
Not so good on muffalettas.
Topic!Cindy - Apr 21, 2005 11:40:27 am PDT #4990 of 10001
What is even happening?
It's a green leafy ingredient type thing (condiment??I don't know.) Maybe you mean garnish
Kinda like parsley but much yummier, unless you are Allyson.I don't think I've ever had it, unless it's been mixed into a food and I didn't know it.
Coriander.Cilantro is coriander?
Not so good on muffalettas.I've never had a muffaletta, either. Is that the Starbucks drink, or a Creole dish? Are there similarly named things?
lisah - Apr 21, 2005 11:40:56 am PDT #4991 of 10001
Punishingly Intricate
It's not coriander. But coriander is the seed and cilantro is the leaf of the same plant.
I like cilantro in moderation.
Aims - Apr 21, 2005 11:41:36 am PDT #4992 of 10001
Shit's all sorts of different now.
coriander is the seed and cilantro is the leaf of the same plant.
No shit. Huh. The things you learn.