Awesome.
I hate to break it to you, oh impotent one, but you're not the big bad anymore, you're not even the kind of naughty.
Xander ,'Showtime'
Buffista Movies 4: Straight to Video
A place to talk about movies--old and new, good and bad, high art and high cheese. It's the place to place your kittens on the award winners, gossip about upcoming fims and discuss DVD releases and extras. Spoiler policy: White font all plot-related discussion until a movie's been in wide release two weeks, and keep the major HSQ in white font until two weeks after the video/DVD release.
Hayden - Dec 02, 2005 11:52:35 am PST #8861 of 10002
aka "The artist formerly known as Corwood Industries."
Kathy A - Dec 02, 2005 12:07:55 pm PST #8862 of 10002
We're very stretchy. - Connie Neil
A quicky review of Aeon Flux is up over at Chicago Tribune:
Big question: With an Academy Award for "Monster" and a gutsy performance in "North Country" under her belt, Charlize Theron might be tired of the unkempt, intellectual route. In adapting MTV's animated series of a scantily clad rebel 400 years in the future, can she regain her sexiness and street cred without having her Oscar retracted?
Catch it: Acted, edited, written and directed without a shred of logic or passion, "Aeon Flux" is a high-octane, indisputably terrible piece of futuristic silliness. But it is so shamelessly and inoffensively absurd that you can't help but get wrapped up in its laugh-out-loud idiocy.
Skip it if: You want a legitimate, comprehensible science fiction saga that makes you think. "Aeon Flux" is enjoyable only if you send your brain for popcorn.
Bottom line: As a movie that costs viewers hours of their lives and producers millions of dollars to make, "Aeon Flux" is an unmitigated disaster--and something that Theron, Frances McDormand, Pete Postlethwaite and Sophie Okonedo could have only signed up for on a drunken dare. But in the "so bad it's good category"--for those with a sense of humor--the flick could be a bigger guilty pleasure than "The Surreal Life."
Bonus: Not only should "Aeon Flux" top Mystery Science Theater 3000's "must watch" list immediately, its endless opportunities for skewering makes it a great drinking game for you and your friends!
Tom Scola - Dec 02, 2005 12:13:20 pm PST #8863 of 10002
Remember that the frontier of the Rebellion is everywhere. And even the smallest act of insurrection pushes our lines forward.
And to think, Joel Hodgson could be making millions right now by getting hired by the studios to salvage movies like this.
DavidS - Dec 02, 2005 12:39:02 pm PST #8864 of 10002
"Look, son, if it's good enough for Shirley Bassey, it's good enough for you."
These were my favorite Chuckisms:
Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.
The chief export of Chuck Norris is pain.
Helen Keller's favorite color is Chuck Norris.
When Chuck Norris has sex with a man, it is not because he is gay, but because he has run out of women. [note: Why does this make me think of Shrift?]
MacGyver can build an airplane out of gum and paper clips, but Chuck Norris can kill him and take it.
Steph L. - Dec 02, 2005 1:26:46 pm PST #8865 of 10002
I look more rad than Lutheranism
This one is a modern fairytale:
Chuck Norris sold his soul to the devil for his rugged good looks and unparalleled martial arts ability. Shortly after the transaction was finalized, Chuck roundhouse kicked the devil in the face and took his soul back. The devil, who appreciates irony, couldn't stay mad and admitted he should have seen it coming. They now play poker every second Wednesday of the month.
Jars - Dec 02, 2005 3:34:22 pm PST #8866 of 10002
Every single person I have ever met is now in receipt of the facts. Oh dear God.
Trudy Booth - Dec 02, 2005 5:48:52 pm PST #8867 of 10002
Greece's financial crisis threatens to take down all of Western civilization - a civilization they themselves founded. A rather tragic irony - which is something they also invented. - Jon Stewart
Chuck Norris forced me to change my tag line. And I thanked him for declining to roundhouse kick me in the head.
§ ita § - Dec 02, 2005 7:04:09 pm PST #8868 of 10002
Well not canonically, no, but this is transformative fiction.
That whole thing is a tagline waiting to happen.
bon bon - Dec 03, 2005 8:42:34 am PST #8869 of 10002
It's five thousand for kissing, ten thousand for snuggling... End of list.
By the time I got to
Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.
I emailed it to everyone I know who likes funny things.
Jessica - Dec 03, 2005 9:47:25 am PST #8870 of 10002
And then Ortus came and said "It's Ortin' time" and they all Orted off into the sunset
Aeon Flux is unspeakably bad. That is all.