...burning baby fish swimming all round your head.

Drusilla ,'Conversations with Dead People'


Buffista Movies 4: Straight to Video  

A place to talk about movies--old and new, good and bad, high art and high cheese. It's the place to place your kittens on the award winners, gossip about upcoming fims and discuss DVD releases and extras. Spoiler policy: White font all plot-related discussion until a movie's been in wide release two weeks, and keep the major HSQ in white font until two weeks after the video/DVD release.


tommyrot - May 16, 2005 8:58:09 am PDT #2782 of 10002
Sir, it's not an offence to let your cat eat your bacon. Okay? And we don't arrest cats, I'm very sorry.

From IMDB:

In the distant future Earth is divided into two camps, the barely civilized group and the overly civilized one with mental powers. A plague is attacking the second group after which it's members cease to have any interest in life and become nearly catatonic. When Sean Connery one of the barbarians, crosses over, the tenuous balance in their world is threatened.

Brutals are told that when they die they will go to the vortex, where the Eternals live immortally. Zed, an Exterminator-class brutal who worships the stone head Zardoz, comes upon an old library where a mysterious stranger teaches him how to read. When he finds a copy of L. Frank Baum's The Wonderful Wizard of Oz, he sets out to learn the secret of the god he worships, and disrupts life in the vortex.

C'mon - how could this possibly be bad?


§ ita § - May 16, 2005 8:59:22 am PDT #2783 of 10002
Well not canonically, no, but this is transformative fiction.

how could this possibly be bad?

Did you click on the link, man?


tommyrot - May 16, 2005 9:00:27 am PDT #2784 of 10002
Sir, it's not an offence to let your cat eat your bacon. Okay? And we don't arrest cats, I'm very sorry.

Did you click on the link, man?

Yeah, but I got light-headed for a bit and forgot what the link was.


§ ita § - May 16, 2005 9:01:05 am PDT #2785 of 10002
Well not canonically, no, but this is transformative fiction.

All that is bad in this world may very well spring from that crotch.


beekaytee - May 16, 2005 9:02:37 am PDT #2786 of 10002
Compassionately intolerant

Staggeringly bad dialogue and endless acid-trip visuals that evoke more of the pukey feeling than the 'preeehty colors' aspect of tripping.

Coherent story? Nah.


Betsy HP - May 16, 2005 9:02:47 am PDT #2787 of 10002
If I only had a brain...

In the future, men will wear diapers with suspenders.

For some reason, all the women will be gay.


Jessica - May 16, 2005 9:06:20 am PDT #2788 of 10002
And then Ortus came and said "It's Ortin' time" and they all Orted off into the sunset

I can't believe Beej and I are the only ones who've seen Zardoz. It's a classic! If I were writing a book about great bad movies, "From The Apple to Zardoz" would be its tagline!

The penis is evil. The penis shoots seeds, and makes new life, and poisons the earth with a plague of men, as once it was. But the gun shoots death, and purifies the earth of the filth of brutals. Go forth and kill!


Gandalfe - May 16, 2005 9:06:20 am PDT #2789 of 10002
The generation that could change the world is still looking for its car keys.

In the future, men will wear diapers with suspenders.

Not just diapers, but ORANGE diapers. And, frighteningly, that outfit is the best thing about the movie.


Matt the Bruins fan - May 16, 2005 9:06:39 am PDT #2790 of 10002
"I remember when they eventually introduced that drug kingpin who murdered people and smuggled drugs inside snakes and I was like 'Finally. A normal person.'” —RahvinDragand

In the future, men will wear diapers with suspenders.

For some reason, all the women will be gay.

Shhh. The Religious Right might hear you and start using pictures from that movie in conversion therapy.


Gandalfe - May 16, 2005 9:07:15 am PDT #2791 of 10002
The generation that could change the world is still looking for its car keys.

I've seen it, Jessica. Many years ago, and I was . . . . influenced . . . . but I saw it.