So, if I do run afoul of a krav practitioner, and I have an equal choice between a big knife and a live raccoon as my weapon, I should choose the live raccoon?
Good to know.
I'm going to see to Wesley, see if he's still whimpering.
Giles ,'Chosen'
Boxed Set, Vol. II: "It's a Cookbook...A Cookbook!!"
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Nutty - Jan 30, 2006 12:56:51 pm PST #6933 of 10001
"Mister Spock is on his fanny, sir. Reports heavy damage."
ChiKat - Jan 30, 2006 12:58:14 pm PST #6934 of 10001
That man was going to shank me. Over an omelette. Two eggs and a slice of government cheese. Is that what my life is worth?
I'm now picturing Nutty with a holster slung low on her hips. On one side, a nasty looking knife. On the other, a pissed off raccoon.
tommyrot - Jan 30, 2006 1:01:49 pm PST #6935 of 10001
Sir, it's not an offence to let your cat eat your bacon. Okay? And we don't arrest cats, I'm very sorry.
So, if I do run afoul of a krav practitioner, and I have an equal choice between a big knife and a live raccoon as my weapon, I should choose the live raccoon?
A good krav practitioner should be able to improvise and handle the raccoon equally well as the knife. A bad krav practitioner might scream, "Ahhh! Raccoon!" and run away.
Betsy HP - Jan 30, 2006 1:03:35 pm PST #6936 of 10001
If I only had a brain...
Surely even a great krav practitioner is going to need to take a few seconds off to giggle?
HANDLING ATTACKS USING HUMOR, IRONY, OR SARCASM -- 2 hours
tommyrot - Jan 30, 2006 1:05:01 pm PST #6937 of 10001
Sir, it's not an offence to let your cat eat your bacon. Okay? And we don't arrest cats, I'm very sorry.
HANDLING ATTACKS USING HUMOR, IRONY, OR SARCASM -- 2 hours
ROTFLMAO - The Not-So-Silent Killer -- 3 hours.
Theodosia - Jan 30, 2006 2:18:46 pm PST #6938 of 10001
'we all walk this earth feeling we are frauds. The trick is to be grateful and hope the caper doesn't end any time soon"
If you laugh your ass off, does it lie there wiggling on the ground like a lizard's tail, distracting your attacker?
DCJensen - Jan 30, 2006 2:18:49 pm PST #6939 of 10001
All is well that ends in pizza.
This all reminds me of the Monty Python sketch Self Defence against Fresh Fruit.
§ ita § - Jan 30, 2006 2:21:35 pm PST #6940 of 10001
Well not canonically, no, but this is transformative fiction.
Surely even a great krav practitioner is going to need to take a few seconds off to giggle?
When you're dead. For something like a raccoon, they have to kill you.
Matt the Bruins fan - Jan 30, 2006 2:30:04 pm PST #6941 of 10001
"I remember when they eventually introduced that drug kingpin who murdered people and smuggled drugs inside snakes and I was like 'Finally. A normal person.'” —RahvinDragand
So, if I do run afoul of a krav practitioner, and I have an equal choice between a big knife and a live raccoon as my weapon, I should choose the live raccoon?
Considering that raccoons are vicious, bitey, and often carry rabies, they can make surprisingly effective weapons.
Jessica - Jan 30, 2006 2:31:35 pm PST #6942 of 10001
And then Ortus came and said "It's Ortin' time" and they all Orted off into the sunset
they can make surprisingly effective weapons.
Tricky to aim, though.