ita beat me to the Quantum Leap monologue. Which is sad, because I memorized it when I was 12 and it has been taking up valuable brainspace all this time, and I doubt anyone will ever ask a question to which it is an apporpriate answer again.

-t, I think it's something like "..three little girls. They graduated from the police academy, and were assigned to very dangerous missions. I took them away from all that, and now they work for me. My name is Charlie."

Wording extremely imprecise because I've seen it, like, once.

For the scavenger hunt, how about Lex's blue glass bottle, from Smallville?

There are those who believe that life here began out there, far across the universe...... with tribes of humans who may have been the forefathers of the Egyptians, or the Toltecs, or the Mayans. That they may have been the architects of the great pyramids, or the lost civilizations of Lemuria or Atlantis. Some believe that there may yet be brothers of man who even now fight to survive far, far away, amongst the stars.

This is the city, Los Angeles, California. I work here. I carry a badge.

One, two, three o'clock, four o'clock rock

"This is the true story (country twang, True Storrrrey!) of seven strangers, picked to live in a house and have their lives taped, and find out what happens when people stop being polite and start getting REAL. The Real World!"

OK, maybe I'll do the whole thing:

Where am I? / In the village. / What do you want? / We want information. / Who's side are you on? / That would be telling. We want information. Information. Information. / You won't get it! / By hook or by crook, we will. / Who are you? / The new number 2. / Who is number 1? / You are number 6. (or as it's been interpreted sometimes You are, number 6). / I am not a number, I am a FREE man! / Moohahahahahah!

In New York City, sexually-based offenses are considered especially heinous...

Wait, you said "great," right?

"Here's how it is: Earth got used up, so we terraformed a whole new galaxy of Earths, some rich and flush with new technologies, some not so much. Central Planets, them as formed the Alliance, waged war to bring everyone under their rule; a few idiots tried to fight it, among them myself. I'm Malcolm Reynolds, captain of the Serenity. Got a good crew: fighters, pilot, mechanic. We even picked up a preacher, and a bona fide companion. There's a doctor, too, his genius sister from some Alliance camp, so they're keeping a low profile. You got a job, we can do it, don't much care what it is."

What's the one that has "Get a ship and someone to crew it" and something about a gun?

Didn't Alias have Sydney giving a voiceover in the first season? I can't find the text of it anywhere.

DX wins.