I get to go home now.

I shall guard my sperm carefully, unless I run into Condi.

I shall guard my sperm carefully, unless I run into Condi.

NOT UNLESS! ESPECIALLY IF!

Oh, and, unrelated to tommyrot's semen, a (possibly partial) list of the Official Academy Award Nominee/Presenter gift bag:

• A Krups kitchen set including a toaster, electric kettle and a year's supply of coffee and tea ($700)
• A two-night stay at The Carlyle hotel in New York ($2,300)
• A red leather case full of Shu Uemura cosmetics, including mink eyelashes ($600)
• A DuWop cosmetic kit filled with a selection of products and a gift certificate for a session with a Cloutier makeup artist. ($740)
• A year's supply of Vonage broadband phone service ($500)
• A Sprint PCS Phone from Samsung
• A three-night stay for two at Palmetto Bluff in South Carolina ($3,600)
• A two-night stay for two at Bernardus Lodge in Carmel Valley, CA($2,500)
• A three-night stay for two at St. Regis Monarch Beach Resort & Spa in Dana Point, CA (includes personal "surf butler") ($5,900)
• A dinner party at Morton's, The Steakhouse ($1,500)
• Kay Unger cashmere pajama bottoms ($500) (only the bottoms??)
• An assortment of Manni Oils' extra virgin olive oil ($540)
• One day of services at Cornelia Day Resort in Manhattan ($3,500)
• A three-night stay at San Ysidro Ranch in Montecito, Calif. ($3,000)
• An 18-inch baroque Tahitian pearl necklace from PearlParadise.com ($3,200)
• A Dyson DC11 canister vacuum (y'know, the one that "doesn't suck")
• A T3 Tourmaline Hairdryer "100% crushed tourmaline gemstones infused into patented T3 components give it more ionic power than any other dryer" ($200)
• Two nights in a Bellagio suite and Two therapies at Spa & Salon Bellagio and Dinner for two at Sensi Restaurant and Dessert at Jean-Phillipe Patisserie and Two tickets to "O" and a $1,000 shopping spree for Jurlique products
• "A Catherine Original" jewelry by Cathy Jordan: sterling silver choker/bracelet/earring sets made of pearls and Bali beads ($500)
• Mr. Handyman gift certificate redeemable for one full day of Mr. Handyman service, presented in a confetti-filled paint can with an upscale black, red and gold design featuring the Mr. Handyman logo. The lid's label reads, "Your Handyman is Inside."
• From Portland's Moonstruck Chocolate Co, 15 handcrafted truffles in a hand made Thai Silk Truffle Box and a certificate for a year's worth of chocolate.
• $10,000 package for a three-night stay at the Opus Hotel in Vancouver, three nights at the Four Seasons Resort in Whistler, lift passes, helicopter transfers, limo transfers, numerous meals, Pilates session, spa treatments, and two OXIA oxygen personal canisters (the second time Opus has made the cut with their astonishing roundup of Canadian hospitality!)

That's just insane. What about the rest of us?

What about the rest of us?

Dude, that's just the official goodie bag. Check out the full blog entry.

Colin was not-quite famous for ten seconds, and got the most shit. It's so unreal.

I WANT A SURF BUTLER.

I will take good care of him, especially if he lets me call him Ramon.

And famous people need those items because, well, it's not like they can afford to pay for them.

So, in your view, sperm bank donors are responsible for their progeny as well?

Yes, they are. Except, as I recall, some states have passed laws providing that donors to sperm banks cannot be held liable for the financial support of their offspring. Also, this issue may not come up much because the women/couples who can afford to pay for sperm bank services can afford to raise the children conceived through donated sperm. Child support issues in these cases tend to arise most often when the child is receiving state assistance and the state is looking for the parents (dad) to pay.

I don't quite get the Opus. I mean, the bathrooms face the street with big clear picture windows. If you want natural light, people on the street can see your bed head. If you want privacy to shower, you have to remember to pull the blinds.

I haven't seen anyone showering yet, but I look everytime I walk by.

I'm trying to decide which one thing I want the most. The baroque pearl necklace is very appealing, but the idea that there are $3500 worth of services that can be performed on me in one day (without, say, general anaesthesia being required) blows my mind.

In the end, I'd probably pick Vancouver. I have a best friend there, and it's been years since we've seen each other.