Aw, man, AmyLiz. That's a gut punch.
The Great Write Way, Chapter Two: Twice upon a time...
A place for Buffistas to discuss, beta and otherwise deal and dish on their non-fan fiction projects.
It was my nephew. God, about fifteen years ago now. It was awful.
Amy, GAH.
Laura, looking at the first one, and I'm wondering, is there a set that requires X amount of words for the layout? Because I think it could use a small amount of condensing. But if that leaves you word-shy on count for production, that's a whole 'nother thang.
No word requirement Deb. I just aimed at a length short enough for an executive to read but long enough to include my points. No doubt I can condense, but I will have to step back at least a couple days to see where.
Laura, I was going to comment on the newsletters, but it's a little difficult since they're in the form of a graphic. Is there a reason for that?
Damn, Laura's format doesn't let me copy and paste.
OK. A couple of small things to make it even crisper than it is, from link 1:
You have the title, dominant: Document Management Digest. Right below it, the question, "What's so great about document management?" And the text immediately following is "The title above was a question posed by my aunt in response to my bragging about our document management system."
I got a bit lost. The phrase itself, Document Management, appears three times before I could catch my breath visually, so to speak. Also, that first sentence is a long one.
So I'd make it a bit more concise, to keep the eye engaged: "What's So Great About Document Management?" - That question was posed by my aunt, after listening to me brag about our document management system."
The basis kept me reading - literally, small tweaks to keep the attention centered.
Just my take.
Laura, I was going to comment on the newsletters, but it's a little difficult since they're in the form of a graphic. Is there a reason for that?
I composed them in Publisher and saved them as png's to pop them into the page template. I would happily e you the text versions if that would be easier for the copy and pasting. I appreciate the comments so much because I wrote them rather rapidly and don't seem to be able to edit them while it is so fresh.
"What's So Great About Document Management?" - That question was posed by my aunt, after listening to me brag about our document management system."
I can see where ... after listening to me brag about our system... would work just as well without the duplication.
insent Ginger and Deb (with thanks)
You betcha! Techspeak is not my strongest point, but I've edited a truckload of it for Nic, who did a whole bunch of marketing and engineering brochures for freelance money in the past.
I sent just the text portions, but you will miss my favorite part - the cartoons!
Got it, Laura. Is there a heavy duty time constraint? Because I've just finished painting wainscoting, am headed for the shower, and it's a catfeeding night, which means a train trip south.