Wet

He was born to be a fluffy white Persian-type cat, but fluffy was apparently against his religion. Buddhist, on the days when he stared at fallen baby birds in confusion; Rastafarian when it came to maintenance of fur.

So, on the appointed days, at the appointed hours, the Bath. In went a dignifed--if outraged--Burmese cat. Out came--

"My god, he's a Gremlin. One of the evil ones. Look at those ears."

"I'd watch the feet. There are claws at the ends of those scary toes."

Pale blue eyes promised death, at least until the warmed towel showed up, accompanied by tuna.

Hee! That's perfect.

Seabiscuit always looks at us like, "You freaks! Why would you do this to me?" And then we tease him, telling him it's no wonder he thinks he's just a small dog.

Has anyone experience with Amazon's self-publishing doohickey? Apparently you send them a pdf, or maybe a .doc and they make the .pdf, and they help you get an ISBN and list you on Amazon. Then, when someone buys your book, they print it out.

I'm so into cover art, and book feel and size and shape (porn) that I'm dubious, but it may be a YouTube sort of thing for books.

Aaaaugh! I have to write a blurb about Gothic Charm School, for my agent to include in the newsletter the agency sends to publishing houses. I, predictably, am drawing a blank on what to say.

"Witty and elegant" should go in there, Jilli.

scribbles notes.

Okay, "Witty and elegant". I have no idea what to come up with for an opening. I'm trying to think of it like a drabble exercise, because it shouldn't be more than 200 words.

Witty and elegant, hip, but never too cool for the room, Jilli Venters' Gothic Charm School column has been a well-loved addition to the Goth internet since(whenever) and keeps its Mistress buried in e-mail month after month.

You could also do something with the "being a Black-Clad-Freak didn’t have to mean being depressed and snarly." stuff from the bio page.

Okay, how's this:

Spooky kids. Morbid teens. They all think they’re vampires. These are just a few of the clichés that people believe about the Gothic subculture. For the past ten years Jillian Venters (writing as the Lady of the Manners) has explained that being a Black-Clad-Freak didn’t have to mean being depressed and snarly. (Witty, sarcastic, and possibly a touch cynical, yes. Mean-spirited, sullen, and rude, no.) Since then, the Lady of the Manners has spent a not-inconsiderable amount of time trying to gently persuade others in her chosen subculture that being a Goth and being polite is much, much more subversive than just wearing black t-shirts with "edgy" sayings on them. GOTHIC CHARM SCHOOL is a look at what life is like as a Goth, and advice on dealing common Goth dilemmas such as people assuming your eccentric wardrobe is a costume, why parents shouldn’t worry if their child starts wearing black velvet and eyeliner, and why friends shouldn’t let friends dress like The Crow.

Dear heaven, that tag never gets old, does it? Makes me happy every time I hear it, and always makes me think of GCS.