I have been scarred by the fleshy-headed crusader. Or, in my head, the cervelliere.

Her rosy bosom swelled above the bodice of her torn gown. She gasped as he touched her for the first time. She all but sighed his name, “Colin, Colin….”

“Oh, Alicia, my sweet. How beautiful you are. I could see your perfection beneath your sarcasm and quick wit.”

“Colin, we musn’t. Your father will be angry and send you away to America! I will not be your downfall, my darling”

“A pox on my father. Let us run away and be married. I have my own land in America. We’ll sail tomorrow. Alicia…Alicia…”

“Colin…Colin….My name isn’t Alicia.”

“I’m not Colin.”

The bad spelling was a mistake. I was in a hurry to get this up because I'm at work and somehow Word didn't put the squiggle-y red line underneath.

I'll leave them though.

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

OK, we're getting into the serious funnies.

In other news, I think my pointed little "I did the edits on the plane, I hope you can read this" proofing of my publisher's first edits to Matty Groves bore some fruit; just got an email saying the the first-pass layout is being fed-exed to me, to arrive Friday. This time the deadline is 1 June.

Two weeks instead of two days. YES PLEASE.

Fleshy headed crusaders.

Bwah!!!!

Sharing bouncy news because I need to bounce this week...

Romatic Times gave Murder in the Hamptons four and a half stars, which is awesome, and said, "Garvey writes a fresh mystery with an unexpected twist." Wheee!

A friend went into B&N yesterday to buy it, and couldn't find it. Asked the manager, who told her they'd sold out. Now, they might have ordered only a few copies, but still. Sold out! (and were ordering more.) The woman in line behind my friend overheard the exchange and chimed in with, "Murder in the Hamptons? Oh, I loved it! I just read it!"

So Renee asked if she knew I was a local author, and also if she'd read Wicked Women Whodunit. She hadn't read it, but told Renee she was going upstairs to find it and buy a copy on the spot.

Takes the sting out of AAR's C+ review, too, which actually didn't sting too much since they give Fs. Seemed like the reviewer thought I could have done better, and I had failed to live up to her expectations, which kind of sucks but is still better than hearing, "Who on earth gave this woman a contract, she writes like an illiterate gnat on bad crack."

And I got the cover for the next book which is a thousand times better than the crapola I had for Murder. So, squee-worthy news.

t /mememe

That's WONDERFUL Amy! Go you!

YAY AMYLIZ!!!!

Woohoo, AmyLiz!

FWIW, a lot of books I thoroughly enjoyed got reviews in the C+ to B range at AAR--their reviews are detailed and idiosyncratic enough that the trick is to read between the lines, figure out the reviewer's taste, and decide to what degree I share it.

Squeeee AmyLiz. Bounce away. You deserve it.

t Goes to Amazon to order book