Oh, Susan, that is just craziness. I'm so sorry you're having to deal with that.

So, yeah, I hope people don't get sick of pet pictures. But, really, I only show the ESPECIALLY cute ones! Really!

cute Toto!

Isn't your fee part of the churches requirements? If it isn't - give her the list of what you do - and ask what parts her relative will be doing....

Susan, you should find a nice way to explain your services to Bridezilla.

I sputtered something on the phone about the things I do, but I was too stunned to be very coherent about it.

But I bet you can't do that because the church needs someone as a go between?

Yeppers. I'm not quite church staff, more of an affiliated freelancer, but I'm the Representative of the Church. Which makes me both a minister of a sort and an enforcer. In the previous weddings I've done, the roles haven't clashed, because the couples have all been gracious about going along with church policy and fully cognizant of the fact they're getting a gorgeous space and good service for bargain fees.

Isn't your fee part of the churches requirements?

Yep. Nothing arbitrary about it.

well, than she doesn't really have much to say about it. But since you are in the in-between mode and are representing the church- I would give her a list of what you do, starting with the fact that you are the go between between the bride and the church - then list all the labor. It is good practice for your other free lance work

I have a counter note to the list your services advice Susan.

I've gone completely Rambo with my wedding work fees and all my other fees, for that matter. No prisoners. The fee is the fee and that is that. Oddly, when I don't get into fine detail or discount my rates, I get better clients!

In the past, when I've listed everything and broken tasks down by price, I got a lot of dickering and bargaining. Give the client the option, and they'll take it!

The fact is, as the church's representative, however freelance it may be, you have automatic credibility and references.

Honestly, whenever clients have tried to bargain down what is already a good fee for good service, and I've replied 'that's nice' and let it go, they have too.

One alternative would be to list your services and ask, which of these would you like to NOT have. For some reason, people don't generally choose to reduce service.

In any case, I feel your pain and wish you lots of better clients.

Bridezilla needs a good smack with a cluestick.

ease-ma for Brendon.

JZ, thanks. BTW, you were included (it goes without saying) in the calm-ma for Emmett's surgery. I looked at Owen's button nose and just went cold thinking about it. I hope everything goes well.

We're getting digital phone service hooked up tomorrow. I fell for the low introductory price (and since Time Warner already owns our souls, figured I'd give them a shot). Anyone have it and hate it? Or should I call them back and cancel? Before I cancel MCI, that is.

And for the record--there is no such thing as hair that is "too short" and there can never be too many Cindy pictures.

- no listing of fees - just a long list of services so the bargin is obvious

this is the inbetween part of the day. DH should be home soon, but I haven't heard from him. so should i do more boxes - watch tv - pick a different chore- slice ham and heat up the potatos gartin for dinner and hope for the best?

One alternative would be to list your services and ask, which of these would you like to NOT have. For some reason, people don't generally choose to reduce service.

Not really an option--the fee is the fee is the fee. The wedding coordinators discussed it, the pastor and the elders approved it, and I couldn't change it if I wanted to. Well, I could, but the change would apply to all weddings, and would have to be discussed and approved by the same group of people.

And that is all I can say about that without tipping over into incoherent rage.

Karl, that's about right. I'm doing my best to not let that rage show for Christopher's sake. He's dealing with enough.