Bridezillacide = bad

Understandable, but bad.

Now that I've killed the thread, I'll bore any hangers on to death. Didja ever look at your favorites list/bookmarks and wonder "What was I thinking?"

I'm going through mine now, and I can't imagine why I bookmarked these sites. It's not even that I don't remember doing it. I have a faint enough memory of seeing the sites at one time or another, but have no frigging clue why I would ever want to see them again.

Oh, I hadn't killed the thread at all.

Susan, you should find a nice way to explain your services to Bridezilla.

vw, Toto is too too cute.

Sometimes that's just what it takes, and it's better to go ahead and blubber and get over and past it. It's nice that you could do it at home, though.

Also, watching BTVS "Wild At Heart" does my tear ducts good.

Susan, if she pushes on the fee reduction, I'd be so tempted to politely tell her that she can pay you no fee, her cousin will surely do a much better job, good luck to you thanks ever so ta.

But I bet you can't do that because the church needs someone as a go between?

Good luck Susan. Sucky people suck and it sure would be nice to do a literal bitch slap every once in a while.

Oh, Susan, that is just craziness. I'm so sorry you're having to deal with that.

So, yeah, I hope people don't get sick of pet pictures. But, really, I only show the ESPECIALLY cute ones! Really!

cute Toto!

Isn't your fee part of the churches requirements? If it isn't - give her the list of what you do - and ask what parts her relative will be doing....

Susan, you should find a nice way to explain your services to Bridezilla.

I sputtered something on the phone about the things I do, but I was too stunned to be very coherent about it.

But I bet you can't do that because the church needs someone as a go between?

Yeppers. I'm not quite church staff, more of an affiliated freelancer, but I'm the Representative of the Church. Which makes me both a minister of a sort and an enforcer. In the previous weddings I've done, the roles haven't clashed, because the couples have all been gracious about going along with church policy and fully cognizant of the fact they're getting a gorgeous space and good service for bargain fees.

Isn't your fee part of the churches requirements?

Yep. Nothing arbitrary about it.

well, than she doesn't really have much to say about it. But since you are in the in-between mode and are representing the church- I would give her a list of what you do, starting with the fact that you are the go between between the bride and the church - then list all the labor. It is good practice for your other free lance work

I have a counter note to the list your services advice Susan.

I've gone completely Rambo with my wedding work fees and all my other fees, for that matter. No prisoners. The fee is the fee and that is that. Oddly, when I don't get into fine detail or discount my rates, I get better clients!

In the past, when I've listed everything and broken tasks down by price, I got a lot of dickering and bargaining. Give the client the option, and they'll take it!

The fact is, as the church's representative, however freelance it may be, you have automatic credibility and references.

Honestly, whenever clients have tried to bargain down what is already a good fee for good service, and I've replied 'that's nice' and let it go, they have too.

One alternative would be to list your services and ask, which of these would you like to NOT have. For some reason, people don't generally choose to reduce service.

In any case, I feel your pain and wish you lots of better clients.