I am out of good coffee, so I am drinking bad coffee.

That's too bad. It's been scientificly proven that bad coffee has fewer anti-gronk particles that bind to the gronk and help flush it out of the body.

I'm up early, as my hours were changed at work to 10:30am-7:00 pm, but I can't turn off my brain.

This morning I got a call from Robert Half, inc., about the possibility of a contract-to-hire position a 45-minute drive from my house.

I have mixed feelings about this. I've been working at the temp place for six weeks, and I really like the people there, but the nature of the business (litigation support) is such that I could wind up unemployed on a moment's notice. On the other hand, they seem to be getting in enough work to keep me employed locally for a while. (5 minute drive from home.)

The other position pays $6/hour more, but I'd lose 45 minutes each way driving my aging boat of a car, so that chops away a bit at the monetary advantage. OTOH? I'd be doing Mac/Windows support work.

The call center is really almost stress free, so I'm reluctant to give it up too easily.

I have an interview with Robert half, Inc., on Thursday to refresh my acquaintance, and then a possible interview with the client early next week.

There are pros and cons of both jobs, now I get to sort them out.

The Mac/Windows support gig isn't in the bag, but I'm feeling like I'm betraying the current position by interviewing. Sigh.

Argh. Life gets complicated, again.

I'm feeling like I'm betraying the current position by interviewing.

Don't. That's the nature of the (temping) beast.

When someone hires a temp, they're saying that (for whatever reason) they can't make a commitment to hiring a permanent employee. So you shouldn't have to have the same level of commitment you'd have as a permanent employee either.

I mean, don't screw them over if you don't have to, but if something better comes a long, don't feel bad for ditching them.

That's too bad. It's been scientificly proven that bad coffee has fewer anti-gronk particles that bind to the gronk and help flush it out of the body.

Yes, I fear there won't be enough anti-gronk agents to enable me to even find a better alternative. After half a cup, gronk still going strong.

My brother was really protective of me when I started dating Patrick -- he was all worried about the "older man" thing. It was cute, especially because Mark is three years younger than me, so he doesn't get to be protective very often. I haven't met any of his girlfriends yet, but if he's had a serious relationship, he's not telling us.

Also, timelies. I have a bottle of lime-flavored sparkling water. I do believe this is my new addiction.

Lime-flavored sparkling water is the bomb. I have mint sparkling water at home, which has its appeal, but it's not as good as lime.

I'd feel bad bringing sparkling water into the Water Plant, so I don't.

I get the loyalty thing, Daniel, but tommyrot is right. As a temp, you are as free to investigate other employment opportunities as your employer is free to terminate you because they don't have enough business. And, besides, an interview is just an interview.

I've recently learned that my mother, whom I haven't communicated with in a good ten years, is failing. She's back in Pennsylvania, and my sources say she's wanting a letter from me. I can manage that--just. My gut twists sickeningly at the idea, but I am her daughter and she's entitled to know where/how I am and all that. I finally got a mailing address through Amy and her mother, as my own blood siblings haven't bothered to get back to me on requests for the address. Amy's mom is the one who got word to me that my mother has been asking about me. If there were ever any doubts as to who my true family is, I think those are well and truly dead.

Aside from the letter, on which I keep saying, "Write it, send it, and put it behind you", I'm thinking of the logical progression of events. When she goes, I do not see myself going to the funeral. My blood siblings are people with whom I shared a room and about twenty years of life back when I was not the person I am. I've got a niece and nephew, but I doubt they'd recognize me. I do not mind being the subject of horrified whispers. If I let myself care about that, I'm buying into an entire structure I no longer believe in. I resent the idea of people I haven't spoken to in years having any say about the way I live my life.

Hubby said, "We'll find a way to make sure you go back." I don't think he really believes I mean it when I say I'm not going. Maybe if I didn't have the ongoing stress of dealing with him and if our world could aborb a sudden multi-hundred-dollar cost, I'd think differently. But I do have that stress, and I'm not going to buy into expectations that will only aggrivate conditions. Hubby also said, "So you'll give up any rights you have to anything still back there?" (ie, the old farm that's been in my family for over a hundred years). I said, "I gave that up twenty years ago when I moved out here." I think that boggles him, because he's never been directly connected to a "landed" family (40 acres in the poverty-wracked borders of Appalachia, not a nest egg waiting to happen).

I wish my mother peace, and maybe life would have been a little better if there wasn't that estrangement. But I've tried multiple times over the years to maintain contact, and I've always been the one left holding the line with no response on the other end. I will grieve when she's gone. But those days are done, and I'm not particularly interested in manufacturing outward shows for the consumption of strangers.

I forgot to bring money today. Luckily I remembered to bring lunch. I scraped up enough change for 1 diet dr pepper, which I'm having now.

Yesterday I went over to Grandma's and looked around again, especially at the yard. I'll need to develop a green thumb, but one of the first things I want to do is pull up all the monkey grass. I hate it and it's everywhere. I'm not sure about other border plants but there has to be something more attractive.

Daniel, that is admirably old school, but nothing applicable to the world of employment today. As you well know, firms have no such loyalty and will layoff people whenever it's financially convenient. Especially as a temp, you don't owe that kind of loyalty.

signed,
Temped for 10 Years

Anne, I worked on your CowGirl ReBop mix a lot yesterday.

Emmett has developed Mystery Leg Pain. I thought he was just sore yesterday because we walked around so much after his fever broke. But it was so painful he couldn't stand up or extend his legs. I thought he'd be better by morning, or I'd at least be woken up during the night if it was bothering him. Nope - it only hurts if he stands on them.

It's very disconcerting because there's no swelling, no obvious cramping, no injury, no bug bite. But it hurts him so much he can't even stand up. So - we're off to see the doctor this morning.

I think his Mom is feeling better from her nasty bout of poison oak, but I'm going to get into work late today - and I really can't miss a lot of time right now. Feh. JZ's off to get bananas for the potassium, but I really don't think he's got regular muscle cramps.

Daniel, I'm with everyone else. It's very nice that you have that loyalty, but not necessary in the real world that we call now.

Connie, I'm sorry this is adding extra stress on you right now. You certainly don't deserve it. Definately do whatever you feel is best for you, though, and don't let anyone else's thoughts or possible thoughts change your mind.

Poor Emmett! The little guy has really had a rough weekend. Good luck at the doctor, Hec.