I really wish I had no idea, but I know exactly what you mean. "Have you tried X?" "Yes... Didn't work and wicked side effects. You should take notes in that file of mine."

My shrink takes great notes and has an amazing memory. When he’s filling out forms, though, he’ll sometimes just ask me for the list of meds I’ve been on. It’s easier than going back through his (getting to be) very thick file on me.

Also, I’m sorry you know that feeling. It’s such a frustrating one. I was so afraid to try the Cymbalta, ‘cause my insurance doesn’t automatically cover it. My shrink gave me samples to start on it while we waited for the insurance authorization. I was really afraid to start it…afraid that it would work, then I’d have to pay out of pocket for it, not be able to afford it and have to go off of it. I expressed this fear to my shrink. He was like, “Have you looked at the list of drugs we’ve tried? They have to cover it. There’s not much left for you to try!” And he was right. They did. And even the new insurance is covering it. I feel like I’ve gotten very lucky. As frustrating as the process is, I know there are still so many people out there suffering like I was and not having any meds to help. Of course, I have had a few drugs that worked for a couple of months then pooped out. I hope that doesn't happen here.

And as far as we ever got is something that helps marginally. I am relying on other skills and cog therapy these days, and like you said, realizing that no drug is going to make things just magically okay.

I’m glad you’re in cognitive therapy. I find it so helpful. I hope you are too.

Night vw. get some sleep. I am off to that dream within a dream too. At least, that's ny plan...

I hope you got some sleep, girl. I’ll talk to you soon, I hope.

What a nice thing to read first thing in the morning, vw.

Thank you, Cindy, Nora and Sail. It really is a nice feeling.

vw said do do

Oh, god. I really do need to be more careful about what I write at 4am!

Congratulations on the apartment, askye! It sounds wonderful, and I’m so very, very proud of you!

All fairness to the stock market, it was correcting stupidity on a massive scale.

Were stocks massively overvalued before the crash?

I am a zombie. I woke up at 4am and couldn't go back to sleep, becuase of thinking about all this crappy stressful stuff. Then once I cleared my mind, my skin started itching all over.

I am seriously hating my brain. Ima stab it with a Q-tip.

Nora, it says right on the box, "Do not insert in ear". Also {{{{hugs}}}}

Had a bit of a freak out this morning. Heard this awful rumbling in the kitchen sink and then there was a stinky breeze coming in through the drain. I plugged it with a dish towel and called the city sewer department. Turns out they were just cleaning out the sewage lines behind our house. The last thing I needed this morning was sewage in the kitchen sink. It would have killed off the Lutherans.

Do you have hives, Nora? I've had stress bring them on, before.

Ok. My people should quit having bad/difficult mornings!

{{{Nora}}} {{{Sail}}} {{{Cashmere}}}

All fairness to the stock market, it was correcting stupidity on a massive scale.

And goodness knows that could never happen again.

I am very angry at my brother for commandeering my television for that idiot. I missed "Girl With A Pearl Earring" which I'm not even sure I would like, but, hey...Colin Firth vs. Dubya? Tough call. Not. That's what I get, being such a non-territorial neo-hippie. (Sometimes I'm still sorry I didn't get to meet Diana Kerry. It'd be nice to swap "My Brother the Candidate? So Obnoxious." stories with somebody who's been there.) My only thought about "fighting the enemies of freedom"? I intend to. But I includeDubya and his posse. He would call that "a radical interpretation of the text."(/Oz)

I don't see any hives. I do have awful dry skin despite my best attempts to moisturize. I will check more closely for hives. I think it's just my brain fucking with me though.

I will endeavor to shake this off though. I feel like such a whiner and a downer.

Mine was very minor in the scheme of things, vw. But thanks.

{{{sail}}}

erika, Girl with a Pearl Earring isn't the best Colin Firth movie I've seen but really, it's gorgeous to look at. Scarlett Johansson has some incredibly kissable lips. Mmmm. And Cillian Murphy has a bit part--although with REALLY bad hair.