BT, Jon, I have some actuarial questions, as I am making the lead character in my new play an actuary. Would either of you mind if I emailed you with various general sorts of things?
Zoe: Captain will come up with a plan. Kaylee: That's good. Right? Zoe: Possibly you're not recalling some of his previous plans.
'Safe'
F2F 3: Who's Bringing the Guacamole?
Plan what to do, what to wear (you can never go wrong with a corset), and get ready for the next BuffistaCon: San Francisco, May 19-21, 2006! Everything else, go here! Swag!
Scrappy - Dec 23, 2004 7:34:04 am PST #376 of 10001
Life moves pretty fast. You don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it.
Frankenbuddha - Dec 23, 2004 7:42:39 am PST #377 of 10001
"We are the Goon Squad and we're coming to town...Beep! Beep!" - David Bowie, "Fashion"
BT, Jon, I have some actuarial questions, as I am making the lead character in my new play an actuary. Would either of you mind if I emailed you with various general sorts of things?
Make sure the character either plays Theremin or is an amateur zoologist. Bonus points for silver pleather.
tommyrot - Dec 23, 2004 7:46:23 am PST #378 of 10001
Sir, it's not an offence to let your cat eat your bacon. Okay? And we don't arrest cats, I'm very sorry.
Actuaries also like to make fun of accountants.
No, seriously. They tell accountant jokes.
This is the only accountant joke (told by an actuary) that I remember:
What's a computer? An accountant with a personality.
OK, accountant jokes aren't necessarily funny....
Jon B. - Dec 23, 2004 7:46:32 am PST #379 of 10001
A turkey in every toilet -- only in America!
For instance, could you calculate the appropriate price to pay if you were buying Britney Spears's future earnings today?
Yes, as long as you're willing to make assumptions about what her future earnings payment stream will look like.
What about a rock; does it have an NPV of zero?
Generally, present values are calculated for things that have a stream of payments, or even a single lump sum payment, some time in the future. Unless the rock is farting diamonds, there's nothing to calculate.
Would either of you mind if I emailed you with various general sorts of things?
I'd be flattered Scrappy!
Jon B. - Dec 23, 2004 7:48:10 am PST #380 of 10001
A turkey in every toilet -- only in America!
No, seriously. They tell accountant jokes.
The "classic" one is the self-deprecating, "An actuary is someone who didn't have the personality to be an accountant."
tommyrot - Dec 23, 2004 7:49:11 am PST #381 of 10001
Sir, it's not an offence to let your cat eat your bacon. Okay? And we don't arrest cats, I'm very sorry.
The "classic" one is the self-deprecating, "An actuary is someone who didn't have the personality to be an accountant."
I thought accountants told that one....
amych - Dec 23, 2004 7:56:16 am PST #382 of 10001
Now let us crush something soft and watch it fountain blood. That is a girlish thing to want to do, yes?
§ ita § - Dec 23, 2004 7:56:53 am PST #383 of 10001
Well not canonically, no, but this is transformative fiction.
Shouldn't that be reversed?
Depends. How do you feel about accountants? Also, do you run Mac OS?
Betsy HP - Dec 23, 2004 8:01:50 am PST #384 of 10001
If I only had a brain...
Unless the rock is farting diamonds, there's nothing to calculate.
You know, I'd buy that rock for the comedy value alone.
amych - Dec 23, 2004 8:03:13 am PST #385 of 10001
Now let us crush something soft and watch it fountain blood. That is a girlish thing to want to do, yes?
My mac is more fun than an accountant, my linux box weirder, and my windoze box crankier. All three with personality, hence my realization that I'd read the punchline reversed in my head, and the deleting.
(Curse you and your quick ctrl-c! Curse you!!!!)