quoting his exact words back to him creates a link between S&M and sexual violence

Or highlights the difference, which is what it did for me.

But I don't think the implication that S&M is pretending (rather than a goal in and of itself) is fair.

I don't think we're supposed to think that Rebecca was being fair.

(And looking at their first conversation from her perspective, who the hell does he think he is, trying to tell her what being tied up does to/for a person? What a presumptous asshole. So neither of them was being fair. He gets more of a pass because he had no way of knowing what she'd been through. She doesn't have that excuse.)

I don't see where there's any strength inherent in it.

I don't either. But if what he said was true, then the strength wouldn't necessarily be illusory. I'm just arguing about the if-then link, not the truth of the if.

What was he doing wrong? He was a pompous romanticising blowhard, but I didn't see any indication that he was a crappy dom or anything.

We do have the fact that he was ousted from the club.

A real dom doesn't make anyone do anything against their will. Putting Rebecca in handcuffs when she clearly didn't want to be there makes him a crappy dom., even if _he_ thought that she secretly wanted it.

"what doesn't kill you makes you stronger" is hogwash. There are lots and lots and LOTS of people on this earth who suffer, and their suffering is crippling, and they never recover. Some people recover, for wide variation in the definition of "recover," but plenty of people just don't.

I think, for the purposes of the aphorism, not recovering = being killed. Slowly, perhaps, but still.

For the purposes of The Inside, I don't know.

I don't think we're supposed to think that Rebecca was being fair.

I wasn't talking about Rebecca's fairness, but Vortex's.

if what he said was true, then the strength wouldn't necessarily be illusory

If what he said was true, then the strength wouldn't be illusory. Because he certainly seemed to be stating it as a real benefit.

I didn't see any indication that he was a crappy dom or anything.

We don't know why he was banned from the club.

I think, for the purposes of the aphorism, not recovering = being killed. Slowly, perhaps, but still.

So, "what doesn't make you worse off makes you better off"?

I'm enjoying reading the discussion here, although I'm not feeling the urge to jump in and contribute, except. . . Tim -- snow tires? In LA?

(I am also confused that Teppy confused Bale with Owen.)