well, give it another week if you can, sj, next week is plotty mcplotty. As I continued to write these things, I started making my act twos essentially act threes which seemed to do a thing.

I was surprised the cop had files with him, I didn't think the police would just let people take them home. unless he smuiggled them out.

Sometimes, Allyson's not wrong.

Also, you said the other day that Michelle Forbes was in Ep 5. But she's playing Zoya, no? Which I thought was going to be 7. Did you switch up the order again?

Well, apparently I think like a network executive (horrors!) because I was thinking the same thing about the creepy doorman, and I was so disappointed. And then I kept watching, and boom! Not him.

I love the guy who played Strong. He's been around, like, forever. He played the awful, arrogant ex-boyfriend Tommy in Valley Girl.

t /nostalgia

Loved Web tonight even more. He fascinates me. That bit at the end - - very cool. I adore the idea that Rebecca may have paged Paul herself, and it's totally in character.

Rebecca's also growing on me -- that solemn, vaguely mournful look on her face, as if all that childhood darkness has risen up to smack her in the face every day now. Loved the way she delivered the line, "You disapprove" to Paul, because it was such a statement, not a question, and yet there was no judgment in it on her end.

Favorite lines: "You've been to church?"

And the response Danny gave to the witness who said you didn't know anal until you'd met whoever. I, of course, can't remember the line now, because my memory sucks, but I loved the way he said it.

Really looking forward to next week. Great idea for a plot.

well, give it another week if you can, sj, next week is plotty mcplotty. As I continued to write these things, I started making my act twos essentially act threes which seemed to do a thing.

Oh, I am not giving up on you that quickly. I think part of the problem is that you are writing it so I expect more than I would from any other show I just started watching. So far the plots seem typical of a lot of other crime shows and I just expect more of something you are writing. I have already told my DVR to record the whole servies and I plan on sticking with it. I am not hating it, I am just not in love with it yet, and I really want to love it.

Kristen, she might have something there.

marked

Also, I told you that these 13 would be a gorgeous scriptbook. They really read very well.

he was so obvious that he was clearly a red herring

And, may I say it, a tad bit of a cliche. The ex-detective surprised me. But I'm not one of those who can read a mystery novel and tell you 20 pages in whodunnit. I just don't think long term plot. I'm into character and dialogue. So, all I can say is keep up the good work, Tim! I'm happy with what I've seen so far.

And the response Danny gave to the witness who said you didn't know anal until you'd met whoever. I, of course, can't remember the line now, because my memory sucks, but I loved the way he said it.

"I'll take your word for it."

Strega, I agree with you to a degree. He comes in exactly at the mid point of the story. And given his function, to be the next step in our investigation, I think you want him at that point. He makes sense there, in a narrative way, and one might actually forget about him when the time comes. I originally had the intercut of them in his office and Mel and Danny at the church exactly reversed -- it started with Paul and Rebecca meeting with the wife, then going to them at the church -- but I changed it and put the emphasis on Mel and Danny because I felt one would be ahead of the action. But by making the intercut less about the office and more about the church, that seemed to help it. And I should have cut all the fishing trip stuff. Also, gotta say, the way I had it staged in the script, with kids running around and the action played outside as he loaded his SUV for a trip without any mention of a trip would also have disguised it a bit more. But of course it was pouring rain that day.

I don't watch procedurals often, but I was wondering if it's a common thing for the locations to appear as on-screen text everywhere the characters go?