I'd totally win the argument though, wouldn't I?

we aren't arguing, nice lady. What you would win is the special prize of FIREMEN!!! woohoo.

Does that help clear things up?

Actually, it does. I rarely hang out at Bureaucracy, so knowing it's often in turmoil helps immensely, as does this:

Lots of people jumped down Sean's throat in Natter and demanded he apologize. All people did to Allyson was disagree with her. Nobody's demanding she apologize.

Although I disagree with

Not what happened. Sean screamed obscenities at ita, ita responded admirably.

There were six whole posts and seven minutes between the Sean and ita posts, and I think that's a lot of time. But that's just my opinion, and I can accept that we don't agree on it.

Polgara, I also think maybe who is being seen as being piled on depends on the reader's perspective, and how close they are to each of the people involved. Obviously, you are closer to ita and Allyson than to Sean, so you feel more strongly about posts directed to them, which is how it should be.

This also makes perfect sense to me, and I should've taken it into account. I did get kinda riled up and defensive on ita and Allyson's part, and it is easier for me to understand Allyson's voice vs. Sean's.

We need a new Bitch thread.

The consensus seems to be "A Whole Different Vibe."

Other subject entirely for a moment: may we have a new Bitches, please?

I got the bitch thing.

There were six whole posts and seven minutes between the Sean and ita posts, and I think that's a lot of time.

Polgara, I think in retrospect most folks are thinking that was too much time. What happened in part (I think) was a certain amount of deference towards ita - to not fight her battles for her - that short circuited what would normally have been a quick response to Sean.

Just for the record, I adore arguing with ita, because she keeps me honest. I vehemently disagree with her on some issues, but she demands I reason carefully and provide facts.

Shouldn't Spikes Bitch 18 be plural?

I don't see anything wrong with people being "piled on" when they are wrong, sorry. Sometimes someone says something offensive to one person, sometimes someone says something offensive to the whole community. The only way to tell which is for people to say so. I know this looks like piling on, but if we are such delicate flowers that we can't handle five or ten people typing "You're wrong," or "You're out of line," we should really think much much longer before hitting "Post message." And this is true of my best friend and my worst enemy.

Also, the WTF factor. Talk about an argument coming out of nowhere!

As I have now been quoted about being squirmy a number of times, I feel the need to note that ita does not always make me squirm. Only sometimes, and in that way that is "Wait, now I have to make sense?? " Billytea attempted to do the same to me when he insisted I could not win mano-a-mano in a squash court against a python; luckily there was a silliness filibuster.

It is decidedly true that it can be difficult to interpret the intent of a person, even a person with whom one has interacted many times. Sometimes I can suss out "Oh, that's Bob, he always talks that way but means no harm", but sometimes I really really can't. Sometimes, even knowing Bob always talks that way, I am still frightened of/offended by/made angry at Bob. This is why being passive and avoidant are good personality tools.