Discussing the first is, effectively, discussing the second.

Well, theoretically, that's up to the poster in question, right?

I have to agree with Allyson, Laura, Kat, ita, and those guys. Simpler is better, Swifter is less painful, and allows for a poster's rethinking of problem behavior before it escalates and becomes more confrontational and problematic.

And I think this:

Rules are one part of the Buffistas, and etiquette, which points to our expectations and culture, is part the second in how this board breathes.

and this:

Etiquette is [more] about how the content affects those in your shared cyberspace.

from Allyson, needs to go in the FAQ. Or somewhere prominent on the front door. I'd lose the "more" I bracketed, though.

I'm in love with msbelle's plan, because the only mandated discussion is with the person that caused the trouble, and as much as I can't stop typing, I think that's the important one.

Right on.

I also want to point out that even though I know we are the creme de la creme of posting boards, and I can't imagine why people don't spontaneously kneel at the sight of us, being kicked off this board is not going to be the end of the world for anyone. It will not cause them physical harm, or cost them money. They can go somewhere else, and perhaps find a group of people to talk to who aren't driven crazy by their personal style. Or not, but either way, it's really not that big a deal.

What becomes a bigger deal to me is when we, as community members, get all worked up and cranky with each other around this kind of issue.

Discussing the first is, effectively, discussing the second.

But Trudy, would that be so if you, Fay, ita, Plei, Allyson, Deena, amyth, amych, msbelle, scrappy, Hec, Aimee, Angus, Steph, Cashmere, Theodosia, jengod, Paul, Sean, Nutty, Jesse, Kat, Jon, John (insert your Buffista of choice here) were the one being warned?

What I mean is, I think if someone is a poster who is actually a Buffista (i.e. the community is a good fit for the poster, and the poster is a good fit for the community), that isn't the case. Granted, it is unlikely any of the people I mentioned above would ever even get a warning. But if one did, I see him/her leaving of his/her own accord at least for a breather (either to feel (!) the righteous anger, or because they were so ashamed they let a bad fight go so far) or really making amends, and the subject never having to be brought up again.

So yeah, in the case of a pain in the ass, is it likely we'll have to warn and that warning will turn to a suspension, and the suspension will probably turn to a ban? Sure. But for the rest of us, the Buffistas (new, old and medium-rare) are much more likely to realize without being told that...

• things are getting out of hand
• this incident of which I'm a part is doing us no good
• I'm going to either apologize or take a break 'til I calm down

...in the first place.

Well, theoretically, that's up to the poster in question, right?

And Nora gets it in one.

For the Record, "msbelle's plan" as ita refered to it is currently posting in lightbulb. AlLso, it is really Nutty's plan modified. I just stole it and then PUUUUSSSHHHHHEDD.

Jesse is so smart! I agree with her, and imagine her wearing a cowboy hat.

Snerk, Misha.

They can go somewhere else, and perhaps find a group of people to talk to who aren't driven crazy by their personal style. Or not, but either way, it's really not that big a deal.

As someone who has self-removed from boards (including this one at WX), I gotta agree with Jesse's point. World keeps turning.

What becomes a bigger deal to me is when we, as community members, get all worked up and cranky with each other around this kind of issue.

Yes, especially when we're getting worked up and cranky about handling the problem of someone who is showing little-to-no regard for community standards.

I think one of the problems that's resulted from the very, very long debates and discussions in here are the posts I've seen from people that they're "loathe" to bring things up in here. I've seen it at least twice in the past couple of weeks, and while I certainly can't blame those people for feeling that way, I think it's indicative of a problem.