Mother's Day is going to suck this year. A year ago, we didn't know her cancer had started to grow again. We didn't know until mid-to-late May. I had no idea it would be our last Mother's Day.

When I got home from my (totally clean, go back in ten years) colonoscopy on Tuesday, my sense of smell was even more acute than usual for some reason (probable reason: I was high as a kite), and the lilacs in full bloom were overwhelming. All I could think was how much Mom would have loved the smell.

This club sucks.