That is awful and I am sorry you have to experience it, but I'm glad you are seeing that it is happening and not just feeling like shit. It is yet another reason for Someone Else to be doing the caretaking, because if he won't listen to you you can't do it, it can't be done.

You obviously know your father better than I do, but it may be his way of maintaining control over things, rather than him actually thinking you're dumb. But whatever it is, it's shitty and he shouldn't do it. The parent-child caretaker thing is so hard.

Ask Dad if hallucinations and good judgment go together as well as he thinks they do.

ppssst Steph - your dad is projecting his insecurities because he does not like you all being smarter than him even though he really respects you all for it. also (((LOVE))

A comprehensive medication review is really essential. I remember my mother going to a Gastro doc because of nausea. She brought all her meds with her, not just the list, and told him she really thought the issue was taking too many dang meds. He said she likely was right. He was a funny guy anyway, but he took an overall look then one med at a time. Mom was in her 90s at this point. Picks up the osteoporosis meds, tosses it in the stop pile, says "that ship has sailed", picks up BP med and notes that she has 3 that basically do the same thing and we need to just take this one, so on and so forth. Took her off everything that was preventative and got her down to like 3 meds. I thought she was going to kiss him. Obviously he coordinated with her other doctors, but he said it happens all the time. This one and that adds meds, but never take away any.

I've seen other doctors wean patients off of every damn med and start from scratch because of issues. It is super tricky business. Of course, my knowledge just comes from decades of working with doctors, not actual expertise! And Teppy, you are smart enough to know what you don't know, but you know a whole lot more about medical stuff than most people because of your work.

I'm sorry your dad is being a jerk, and you get so many karmic points for sticking with it. I'm glad you have your bro, your therapist, and us to vent with! (and Tim of course, but sometimes spouses are harder to vent to because they get too worried)

I have a webex for financial systems training (training 3 of 5) today - ALL DAY. It is supposed to be starting NOW, but the instructor is not there. HAHAHA

I will not be sad if this gets cancelled today. OTOH - having this class today was my excuse not to deal with the communication nightmare that is my office.

What I really want is to go back to bed. Maybe have a long soak in the tub first.

oh I cursed it. Class it is.

All day! Yikes. I hope it is at least well done.

And Teppy, you are smart enough to know what you don't know, but you know a whole lot more about medical stuff than most people because of your work.

I hope I can convey that to the geriatrician, since he's never met me.

And I don't doubt that my dad's impulse to tell both of his adult children that they're stupid is a control thing, and I have compassion for him feeling like a lot of shit is outside of his control. But saying hurtful shit to your kids for literally their entire adult lives is not an acceptable way to manage that feeling. Today is probably not the day for me to bust him in the moment when he inevitably says something that paints me as dumber than a box of hair, but that reckoning is coming.

Sorry Steph, sounds stressful.

I keep thinking I'm done with this feature, but then the goalposts move again.