Oh, JZ, all my love to you.

So much love, JZ

Oh, JZ, I am so sorry for all you're going through right now. The way you describe the church and the service and everyone present, so lovingly and attentively -- it makes me feel like I was there too, looking out through those sea glass windows. I hope you feel the love of all those who couldn't be there with you. ♥ ♥ ♥

sharing this grief in this specific space, with all its personal weight, with him felt as intimate as anything we've experienced in the course of our marriage.

Grief is such a powerful, raw emotion.

I'm glad for the fact that your family was able include those who in many families would be excluded. My Mom attended my Dad's memorial service. Families get complicated but when those who have loved are welcome, I think it makes everyone stronger. Especially in these fraught times.

Please be gentle with yourself. It's a rough world.

Oh JZ, all my love and sympathy to you. Funerals are so weird, something so sad yet full of love and drawing everyone (metaphorically) closer.

What a beautiful place, thanks for sharing pictures and descriptions. Even as reduced as it was, the ceremony was dignified and gracious, and everything your father was due in these horrible circumstances.

JZ, your beautiful description of the cathedral made me feel like I was there.

And the 13 of us, widely spaced into our tiny family units--Matilda and Hec clutching me and both of us clutching Matilda to support each other through the insupportable; my aunt, who just buried her husband and is now burying her baby brother, and her daughter; another highly problematic cousin and his spouse, who shrugged off all their issues when this came crashing in; my father's partner, weeping by herself because none of us were allowed to touch her and the only person by whose side she could have safely been was in that stainless steel box; my middle brother, all alone at the end of our pew; another cousin to our left, and his ex-wife, whom my dad had always treated like family no matter what her legal status, on the right. The office manager who thought of him as a second father. The old friend from decades back. And no one else in all the world.

This is the extravagant cruelty of it all. The separation is where this disease unnecessarily runs up the score. I'm grateful, at least, that you, Matilda, and Hec could cling together.

Oh, JZ. My heart goes out to you, to David, Matilda, and the rest of the family. {{}}

Hey gang, am I out of line in thinking that if someone is still referring to "my room" and "my living room" with regard to a significant other who moved in with them weeks ago, it's an indication they weren't ready to live together?

You're at least not wrong to question it, Matt. Habits are hard to break, though. How long did the someone live there without the s.o.? Did the someone live on their own for long before the s.o. moved in?