My therapist and I agreed last week to stop my therapy.

Yesterday I was RAGING, I thought no lunch was adding to it, but nope, still would like to physically hurt (not metaphor) people today. And I keep crying, so this feels anxiety attack-like.

I've closed out my other social media screens just now, yell at me if you see me there before this evening.

I hope this is not menapause mood swing related. I've been have hot flashes recently, so it could be. I do not like at all not one bit.

Back of mind nagging underlying all this: Why do I talk and post so much, it's so annoying. Not needing hairpats just needing to brain dump it all so it'll stop cycling.

msbelle: Talk and post more! Here because I prefer to spend my time here. Better than punching people, probably. I don't think I had a lot of mood issues when I was menopausal, but it was a while ago. The things that seriously alter my mood are sleep deprivation, or hunger. It happens infrequently because I work hard to avoid those conditions, but my family notices right away and suggests I fix it.

Similarly to Hulk I operate generally with a lot of anger, always have. It just doesn't look like anger outwardly most of the time.

Yesterday someone cut me off and dismissed my CORRECT assessment of what we needed to do in a work situation and I wanted to leap over my desk at him. From our coworkers expressions, my face made those feelings clear. I have not recovered yet. Throat punches all around are warranted, I think.

So I'm staying in my office and have the radio on, but my mind is just spinning.

Yesterday someone cut me off and dismissed my CORRECT assessment of what we needed to do in a work situation and I wanted to leap over my desk at him.

I have moments like that. Fortunately I work at home.

Tomorrow is my blessed blessed work from home day and I hope I can reset a bit of the rage. My plan is to get some food in the crock pot in the morning and have meal prep for the week done by bedtime.

Maxing out the deductible is a freeing experience.

Gud! I'm so glad and relieved you're taking this step!

If you have maxed out the deductible you may be close to hitting your out of pocket maximum. Your wife should check that for you. Once you hit that cap you pay ZERO out of pocket. I hit that 2 years. If you have also see how many therapy sessions ar covered and then go as much as possible.

Unfortunately, I'm well away from the out of pocket maximum. Well, I suppose overall that's fortunate.

Hitting the deductible is still pretty sweet. (I mean, "sweet" in the sense that "The US health care system is gouging those who can more or less afford to pay and killing those who can't afford to pay, but hey, if you can more or less afford to pay, hit that deductible and keep getting health care until your plan's year ends!")

Just voted in the MO primary. The election volunteer kept thinking I had grabbed the wrong ballot because the number didn't match the Republican ballot for my precinct. Took a second volunteer to help the realize the number didn't match because I picked up the Democratic ballot. I don't live in the most liberal of places.