Yes, deplorable taste. As is having Camilla in that particular grouping, frankly. At her husband's side at the wedding, of course. But not in the pictures of record.

Definitely follow up with the kitten, msbelle! Not to scare you, but now would be the age when some conditions start showing up, like a heart defect. Better to get a professional opinion, or at least to make sure the next carer had a heads-up on possible problems to look out for.

And to make this a separate post -- Gud, one thing that made me twitch was that you wanted to spare your wife feeling guilty for getting mad at you. To me, that means you are not only enabling her to keep on yelling at you in the future -- it's depriving her of the consequences of her actions that would give her the correct feedback on what she's doing/done.

I suspect that she deflects a lot of her anxiety into perfectionism, and extends that perfectionism to you, who is never going to be able to get everything exactly right because two people are rarely able to agree 100% what 'perfect' is.

My rule of thumb for whether to make a big fuss is when mistakes that could be injurious are made, like when my absent-minded roommate walks out of the house and forgets to close the door -- let alone LOCK it. She gets easily flustered and really can miss stuff like that, when she needs to slow down and run through a mental checklist. I try not to get too loud (even though, SHEESH) because that just piles more stress onto someone who is already PTSD.

I wonder if you could sell your wife on couples therapy because =you feel= you are failing as a husband and need some guidance to become the partner she deserves. (She has to step up and modify some of her behavior -- don't we all? -- but put that way, she has the fig leaf of it being =you= that is the problem.)

I really don't mean to pile on you in addition to all what the others have said. You seem to take on way too much in terms of responsibility and support in your relationship.

PS -- it's really a true PTSD diagnosis for my roommate. It kind of explained a lot.

Glad to hear the kitten is doing well, msbelle

And Gud, it's good that you can come here and vent. We are truly have your best in mind. I am guessing that when we criticize your wife's behavior, it feels like we're criticizing you, but we all hurt to see you hurting, especially when it seems like she's more concerned with her own feelings than yours

My stepdad's niece and husband finalized the adoption process today of the boy they've been fostering for 18 months. They posted pictures and such on Facebook, and I got to see how they spell his name (because you hear it for over a year and assume one thing, but...no). It's pronounced "Jackson." And spelled "Jaxsyn," which I have never seen before. So, that's different.

"Jaxsyn,"

This sounds like a pharmaceutical to me.

(I know I don't really have a leg to stand on, because Aeryn, but still.)

My mom texted me and said (I quote) "What the fuck kind of spelling is that?" Well put, Mom.

Well, on the bright side, when he gets older he can change the spelling but keep the name/pronunciation.

This irks me because I have issues with people misspelling my name ... usually elaborating it, since it's pretty much the plainest possible spelling of my first and last names. The name I use is my middle name and mostly people will drop the second "d" which I find ignore-able.

Lol. That reminds me of how when I'm reading advice columns I often try to wonder about what the letter would look like if written by one of the other people in the story. Like normally the response is "what kind of crazy awful controlling grandparent would bitch to their child about the grandkid's name? Take a chill pill". But sometimes the parent names the kind Xylmrn or something!