Self Care: I just bought Hamilton tickets.

Nice.

My self care today - kinda lacking. I haven't showered or put on a bra. I'm working in my PJs. I have a ton of work to get done since I'm taking Friday off so they can SHOOT A LASER AT MY EYEBALL. I am doing a kind of fast for the next two days (it isn't a true fast, but it is a very limited intake beyond water thing) so I won't stress eat the rest of the cake that is in the fridge. If the rest of the family doesn't finish it tonight, I'm chucking it.

I want to travel and hang out with a Buffista or two (or five hundred). Not sure I can swing that before the end of the year - but next year Buffista travel will be one of my goals.

I'm just working and trying not to think.

I'm up. I've showered and gotten dressed.

You got me beat!

I just feel this heavy weight on my shoulders and the tears are barely contained. Do I up my anti-depressants? Do I take half a Lorazapam to help fight off this feeling? Will that knock me out today? Or let me get work done? These are questions I think I can answer.

But there are so many big picture questions I can't even voice right now. Though the one that really punches me in the gut is - if there is some way to impeach Trump or get him to resign, then we get Pence. Who....I can't decide which one would be worse for the country. Both terrify me.

I'm avoiding most of FB, just reading a few groups that are politics free for the most part. I have Angel on the tv in the background and the only news I want to look up is how the rest of the Colorado ballot issues went.

Pence seems less likely to get us into a global war, I guess? Small comfort.

Have eaten breakfast. Making lunch. Next up, shower. If I can figure out what to wear, I should be able to make it in to work, and presumably there will be enough work stuff to fill up my head and keep me busy today.

I'm putting my faith in the pragmatisim of greed that knows you can't make money on a glowing cinder. We should also start seeing some internal bloodbaths now that they don't have the election to be united by anymore.

OK, my loves, I am armored in ordinariness and will now head out into the day. Be good to yourselves, stay safe.

END MEETING END I HAVE NO INTEREST IN THIS KIND OF PETTY BULLSHIT TODAY

I'm at work helping people, I ate breakfast, and I haven't thrown up.

I'm counting those as triumphs for now.

I have the TV on because I need to see Clinton's concession speech, but since it's delayed, the nonsense on the TV is giving me a headache.