We probably couldn't afford our neighborhood now. We keep getting postcards and even cold calls from people wanting to buy our house. Our neighborhood is getting way too gentrified, and it blows.

We keep getting postcards and even cold calls from people wanting to buy our house.

OH MY G-D, THE COLD CALLS.

I answered a number I didn't recognize the other day, because I thought it might have been the sleep study center (their phone number changes every other month or so, depending on which location someone is doing the reminder call from). I was assailed by this very chirpy sounding Young Professional Bro, letting me know that an associate of his had recently sold a house in our neighborhood for Big Money, and were we thinking about selling our house?

As soon as he paused for breath, I said, "I wouldn't work with anyone who cold called me", and hung up.

I also had one Young Professional Bro come to the door and do the same sort of line. I shut the door in his face.

I got one of those calls and I rent. That's some bad research there.

I also had one Young Professional Bro come to the door and do the same sort of line. I shut the door in his face.

Oh my god. I only reluctantly answer the door, but I work in direct line of sight of the door, and if it's a nice not-humid day, I keep the front door open to get the breeze through the screen door. Which means that the people who come to the front door can see me and it is THE WORST. If a Real Estate Bro showed up, I would pray for a flamethrower.

Oh my god. I only reluctantly answer the door

Did you know that if you answer the door to Nice Mormon Boys while wearing a velvet skirt and a vampire-themed t-shirt, lock eyes with them, and smile slowly and widely, showing all your teeth, they start stumbling over their words and back away down the stairs?

This is something I learned recently.

That makes me happy, Jilli.

I'm pretty sure my house is still not going to go for as much as I paid for it. It is nice to think that someday it might.

This is something I learned recently.

You are a delight and a treasure.

Did you know that if you answer the door to Nice Mormon Boys while wearing a velvet skirt and a vampire-themed t-shirt, lock eyes with them, and smile slowly and widely, showing all your teeth, they start stumbling over their words and back away down the stairs?

Also, if your father happens to answer with a gun he got for xmas and tells them very politely no thanks and please don't knock again, they never will? (The gun was happenstance - he didn't take it to the door on purpose. There's always a gun for xmas, right hippocampus?)

I want to sell my condo but there's no way I could afford anything better in this neighborhood.