"Not your fault" is among my favorite three-word phrases, along with "I love you", "you were right", and "have some chocolate".

"Nice editing job." "There's more bourbon." "Damn, that ass!" (The last can be favorable commentary about your own ass, or as a means of drawing your attention to another fine, fine ass. Either way it's a win.)

That was presented as a thing people do (to technically not be having sex) on Alpha House. Called "soaking".

The raciest thing I was reading in 4th grade was probably Gone With The Wind, but I was definitely seeking out the naughty bits of Piers Anthony and Heinlein books by the time I was in middle school. In retrospect, absolutely terrible source material for learning anything about actual sexual relationships between human adults, but, well, puberty.

I just want to go back in time and erase Piers Anthony from my brain. VC ANdrews and CLan of the Cave Bear are far superior, Piers Anthony just makes me feel icky now.

In more oversharing, I discovered masturbation by accident one night. Then I was mortified that I had sinned, because at one point I had tried to read the whole bible so I was familiar with Onan and God smiting him because Onan committed Onanism.

Onan's sin wasn't masturbation, or even spilling his seed, so young tommyrot didn't need to worry! I remember this argument from Bible class in HS.

Yeah, I was told that later. So now I feel free to wank away!

"Damn, that ass!" (The last can be favorable commentary about your own ass, or as a means of drawing your attention to another fine, fine ass. Either way it's a win.)

Another point where commas are crucial! "Damn that ass" without a comma would say to me you are wishing hellfire on a jackass...

Also in the bible iirc.

Although maybe that was just a talking donkey who was not damned. There was a cursed fig tree, I'm pretty sure.

Didn't Balaam's Ass run into some trouble?